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Hold Me Closer | JJK
Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader (ft. brother Jimin)
Genre/Tags: brother’s best friends au; slight angst, fluff, smut
Warnings: foul language, alcohol consumption; kitchen emergency; eldest child feels, adulting; explicit sexual content (making out, oral m & f receiving, unprotected sex but be safe please!); Seven JK (18+)
Word count: 19.2k
Read Part 1: Hold Me Close
Summary: When you're asked to look after your parents' house and meet them before they go on vacation, you, Jimin, and Jungkook take the trip to your hometown of Busan and relive memories of your youth. While your new relationship has you feeling like a lovesick teenager with all the affection that Jungkook shows you, you're still you - a professional trying to make it in the corporate world, and an eldest child trying not to disappoint her parents. And that turns out to be your undoing, as a little blunder causes a rift between you and Jungkook, resulting in a trip that you might as well have messed up... Not if your brother can help it, though.
Listen to 🎵: Hands Down by Dashboard Confessional
Playlist 🎶: High School Playlist
A/N 1: I know I said I’d be on a break but I reread Hold Me Close and found comfort in this Jungkook 🥹 so I went ahead and wrote this little piece! Whipped and comforting boyfriend JK is what I needed so I hope you enjoy this 💕
Six - the number of work calls you’ve already taken in the last hour, with each one of them lasting one whole song. Jungkook calculates that you’ve spent half of the entire drive since leaving Seoul talking with your boss about some report that he somehow can’t complete without you, which sucks because Jungkook was really looking forward to this road trip with you and his best friend.
You groan after you hang up and the clackity clack of the keyboard continues. He was hoping to hold your hand while he drove and maybe sing with you some of your favorite songs that he put on but it doesn’t seem like those will happen anytime soon. You’re immersed in your work but he guesses you have to be; the sooner this ends, the sooner your focus will be on him and this present moment.
He finds the positive side of it at least. He gets to listen to you explain things - why the numbers are what they are, what targets you reached, and what risks you managed. It’s quite silly but it’s kind of a turn on, hearing you talk about something you know like the back of your hand, pretty much proving to your crap of a boss how good you are at your job and why you’re an asset to the company. You know your shit, and you have a classy way of making sure they know that you do.
Six calls, and Jungkook already knows half of your project report. And perhaps he’ll know more, as the seventh one comes.
You let it ring for one, two, three times, as you hold your phone in one hand while you continue to type away with the other.
“I swear to god, ___. If you don’t pick that up, I’m gonna throw your phone out of this car,” Jimin, who’s comfortably seated in the backseat, growls.
The dramatics is understandable because one, it’s Jimin and two, the constant ringing is a little bit much.
“___, I’m not fucking kiddi—”
“Hello, sir,” you finally answer, then proceed to discuss this month’s analytics and projections for the succeeding quarter.
Jungkook predicts it’s gonna take you another whole song to finish, so he instead focuses on the road and appreciates the clear skies and familiar scenery of the drive to Busan. His thoughts go to how these next several days are gonna go. There’s visiting your favorite spots growing up, going to a resort, staying in to eat and play video games, and of course, cuddling with you in your room, as you and Jimin will have your parents’ house to yourselves once they leave for their anniversary trip in two days.
His musings are disrupted though, when he looks at the rear view mirror and sees Jimin’s annoyed face blocking his view. Jungkook can’t help but laugh, especially when he hears his best friend grumbling complaints just behind him.
“Leave her be, she’ll be done soon,” Jungkook dismisses him. “They sound like important stuff.”
“She’s talking so loudly!” Jimin groans. “I just want to reminisce and sing along to our teenage emo music, Kook.”
Jungkook turns the music off.
“There, I paused it. You can sing along once she’s done speaking on the phone,” he says.
Jimin pouts in response. “You always take her side. You weren’t like this when we were kids.”
“Well, if it means anything, I always took her side. I just never told you,” Jungkook laughs.
“Traitor.”
“I’m literally your most loyal friend.”
It’s a statement that Jimin can’t counter. Jungkook is his most loyal friend. And the most supportive. And the most dependable. And definitely the one who’s never left his side.
When Jimin casually told their group that he likes girls and boys, Jungkook was the only one who didn’t need time to “warm up to the idea.” Jungkook was also the only one who never disappeared whenever he had a girlfriend. He was also the one who never missed a single one of Jimin’s dance showcases in college and professional shows.
And of course, Jungkook was the one friend who took up his offer to drink that Friday afternoon, resulting in that infamous gutter incident - as you like to call it - and his subsequent unemployment and homelessness. While you, his beloved sister, were there to pick up the pieces, so was Jungkook, the way he promised he would after they became friends at 10 years old.
Those months when Jimin was heartbroken and unsure of what he was going to do with his life, his best friend was there to make sure that he wasn’t going to lose his drive and love for dancing. His best friend is also the one constantly cheering him up about this long-distance relationship that he decided to have with Taehyung while others continue to be a skeptic.
Jungkook is that friend, and Jimin supposes he can forgive the other man every time he sides with you.
Jimin is about to complain again when you put the phone down and make one of your restrained cries. He pities you, but it doesn’t change the fact that he wishes you wouldn’t be doing your work stuff while you’re on a trip of what’s supposed to be a mini-break.
“I don’t get why you don’t pick up after the first ring,” he huffs.
“It’s so Mr. Soo knows that I’m not easily available,” you say.
“But you are. You answer it anyway,” Jimin rolls his eyes.
“Exactly, I’m gonna answer it anyway. Might as well make him wait for it because he needs me,” you point out. “It’s bad enough that he’s calling while I’m taking the leave he approved, so I’m just pissing him off. He doesn’t know I changed the prompt to leave me a voice message to an annoying song so he’ll have to sit through it to get to me. I already know it’s getting on his nerves.”
“Ooh, petty. I like that,” Jimin hums.
“I know. I got that from you,” you proudly smile.
“But why are you even working?” He whines, your brother’s tone more of pity than annoyance. “It totally defeats the purpose of a leave. And you shouldn’t be indulging him!”
“Well, Mr. Soo approved this leave thinking that Chul would help him craft this report, which is based on the project that I proposed, only to realize that he doesn’t know shit about it because I wrote everything, and he just took the credit,” you explain. “I don’t want to be doing this, too, but I also just took the chance to show who’s driving the wheel, and it’s definitely me. Plus, I worked hard for that project. Working on the report at least gives me a chance to give myself credit for it.”
“Hmm, I guess you’re right,” Jimin concedes. “Your voice is just so loud.”
“I’m sorry. I just wanted to match his tone,” you say. “But he’ll be in a meeting for the next hour or so and he probably won’t need me again until then. You can turn the music back on.”
“Ugh, thank god,” Jimin groans again. “I missed my favorite song.”
He leans forward and squeezes himself in the small space between you and Jungkook. The proximity causes Jimin to smack his elbow on your face, which you know is intended, considering how much of a brat he is. So you do what you always do - flick the back of his head.
He yells but gets over it once he manages to press the rewind button and plays the song he’s been wanting to hear. You haven’t been paying attention throughout the drive and hadn’t even known what they were listening to, but once the music comes on, a wave of nostalgia hits you.
You take the CD case you see in the compartment and scan the song list.
“Dashboard Confessional?” You read out. “Mayday Parade? Something Corporate?”
You go through 2 other CDs and look at both men questioningly.
“These are literally plucked out of my high school playlist that I illegally downloaded,” you state, given that music streaming sites weren’t a thing over a decade ago. “Why do you have them in CDs? And did you even know these songs back then?”
“Yes, because we listened to your playlist when you weren’t around,” Jimin confesses, earning him a flick on the arm.
“You went through my computer? You were in my room?!” You yell.
“Don’t be dramatic,” Jimin rolls his eyes. “It was a boring room, there was nothing to see. We just wanted your music because they were cool, but I’d never admit it.”
“I’m sure,” you shake your head. “But it was my ex, remember? He was a new kid from the US and he got me into these emo rock bands and I thought they were cool, too. He downloaded them illegally for me and I just jammed to those songs all the time even after we broke up.”
“We know. Jungkook and I could hear it from my bedroom,” Jimin says, “which is why we used to sneak in and listen when you weren’t around.”
“Is that why you put them in a mixtape? So you could listen to them whenever you wanted?” You ask, turning to Jungkook because between the both of them, he’s definitely the one who’d know how to do this.
“Yeah, Kook. Why did you make these mixtapes when neither of us had a portable CD player… but my sister did?” Jimin presses, cocked eyebrow and smug face on display.
You’re looking at him now, and it’s a curious look that Jungkook can’t resist.
“I just thought to put your most played ones in CDs,” he shyly admits, “and uh, planned on giving them to you before you left for college. But I chickened out so I just left them in a box in my room that I brought to Seoul. I’d forgotten all about it until Jimin raided my studio and found them.”
“You… you made me mixtapes? When you were 15?” You ask.
“___, I think I’ve established enough that I had a huge crush on you when I was a teenager,” he turns to you and laughs.
It’s a little embarrassing even if he’s already dating you. It still feels surreal sometimes, as he thinks of his growing up years and how he always looked forward to sleeping over at Jimin’s place and then catching glimpses of you. There were the times when you’d watch movies with them in the living room, and then he’d help you clean up in the kitchen so he could spend more time with you.
That was over 10 years ago and so much has changed, but the admiration he felt for you never dwindled. There was always that image of you looking happy. He kept that version of you in his mind, even when you had your boyfriends. He just wanted to remember your smile, and now he gets to be the reason for it, like now.
“It’s just… it’s very sweet and thoughtful,” you say softly.
“I… Well… I took interest in the things you liked. I guess that happens when you like someone.”
“Told you he’s a romantic,” Jimin nudges you.
Between the fairy tattoo he designed and did on your shoulder, the dinner and picnic dates he takes you to despite both your busy schedules, and the way he holds you so close to him whenever and wherever he can, you can definitely say that Jungkook is a romantic.
It’s only been three months but it feels as if you’ve been dating him for longer, given the overflow of affection he’s been giving you. It’s in the way he always holds your hand and kisses you so passionately. It’s in his encouraging words and the way he spoils you with the littlest things.
It’s refreshing to be with him. He has boyish charms that have become even sexier with his slightly long hair and the lip ring that he recently got. And whatever he’s wearing, there’s just something so comfortably sexy about him that’s both warm and exciting, and you often find yourself swarmed in butterflies whenever he talks about you.
It’s only been three months but it’s a relationship you’re still slowly being open about. Your friends were definitely surprised. Hoseok fell off the couch with all his body movements; Jin spat out his drink; Yoongi gasped, then followed it up with a teasing smirk; So-Hee and Na-eun gushed over how Jungkook treats you, and took the chance to say how he’s gotten more handsome over the years.
You asked them if it was that shocking for you to be dating someone younger - and your brother’s best friend at that - and while they said it was a bit unexpected, what really got them was how different Jungkook is from your exes. He’s not some corporate man with ambitions, they pointed out. His life is less structured, too, given his freelancing career and gig at the tattoo parlor. He’s definitely a lot more laid-back and more casual than they’re used to.
They were short of remarking that Jungkook’s lifestyle isn’t as stable and secure as what you normally go for, and they wouldn’t be wrong. It’s a thought you’ve had before, and something even he brought up because he didn’t want you thinking that he can’t keep up with you. But you’d been the one to point out to your friends that stability can come in different forms. With how Jungkook has been so dependable and assuring, that’s given you more security than you ever thought.
But it’s not something that’s easy to explain. Maybe your friends could understand. They’ve made careers in different industries, after all, with short term jobs forming part of their resume. But your parents are of a different generation and mindset. Stability for them means one thing, and they raised you to want the same thing in the same way.
Which is why it’s already been three months, and you still haven’t told them about you and Jungkook.
“I started young,” he laughs, pulling you out of your thoughts as he takes your hand and interlocks his fingers with yours. “I used to just choose my moments of romance but with you, I’m romantic all the time.”
“Really? Does being a flirt count as being romantic?” You cock an eyebrow.
Because that’s what he is. He likes to tease and call you out when he affects you. He likes to charm and then edge you until you’re pleading for him to do more.
“Definitely! I mean, I’m out here living my teenage dream, you know?” He winks at you. “Not just anyone gets to say that they’re dating the person they had a crush on when they were 13.”
“Oh god, here we go again,” Jimin groans, earning him a laugh from you and Jungkook.
But even if your brother fake-gags at your not-so private displays of affection, you know deep down that he’s happy for you and his best friend. The two most important people in his life found comfort in each other, and he gets to witness and bask in that.
He also gets to brag that it all happened because of him.
You spend the next hour jamming to all your favorite emo rock songs because Jungkook wasn’t kidding - he really did include all of the ones you had on repeat from your playlist. It takes you back to over 10 years ago of playing the music so loud while you’re in your pajamas, jumping on your bed and singing your lungs out. They don’t really remind you of your ex-boyfriend. That was a short-lived relationship that only really had you appreciating the songs he shared and not much more.
Your boss doesn’t reach out to you until a half hour later. He’s taken to sending you messages instead, and when he does, you’re back to typing away on your laptop, to the displeasure of both men.
They don’t call you out this time and instead leave you be. Until, of course, it hinders you from enjoying yourself.
The car has stopped but you’re still on your laptop, double checking figures. Jimin has stepped out after telling you that he’ll throw your laptop in the ocean if you don’t stop, but Jungkook stays with you inside the car. He bops his head and hums to the music that neither of you could barely hear. He picks on his fingers and yelps at the hangnail he pulls out. He opens the window and shoos away a bug, then hangs out his head to feel the late morning sun.
“Kook, you can go out if you’re bored,” you say, your eyes still glued to your screen. “You don’t have to stay with me here.”
“But I want to,” he responds. “I’m not leaving until you do, not when you said we’re spending the week free from work and stress.”
“I just need to get this done,” you sigh, rechecking your stats for the third time and then aligning the table. “I’ll be finished soon.”
“You said that 15 minutes ago,” he points out, not wanting to sound like he’s complaining, although he might as well be.
“It’s just—”
“You’ve done your part, babe. You’ve encoded the figures and cross-checked the targets and objectives. Writing the rest of that report and formatting it isn’t your job anymore,” Jungkook says. “You weren’t even supposed to do those. You’re not on the clock. You’re on leave, and you deserve this break.”
“I hate that I have to work, too, but it’s not something I just can’t do, not when my boss is calling and expecting me to do all this,” you groan.
You see his eyebrows furrow and you get defensive.
“You know what, nevermind. You work solo, you answer to no one, you don’t have to prove yourself to corporate assholes. You won’t get it.”
You sigh once more and return to reviewing the conclusion, but the sudden silence is unnerving. You glance at Jungkook and see the look on his face - it’s not sadness but disappointment, and it’s one you don’t see very often on him.
You’re about to apologize when he speaks, his voice soft and low, as if speaking is difficult for him.
“I work with so many clients on a daily basis, with more than half of them setting deadlines that they don’t even follow and demanding so many things so yes, I get it,” he says. “But I put my foot down when I need to, because I learned a long time ago that I shouldn’t let people walk all over me. I know you’re up against a lot of things and you may feel like your hands are tied but they aren’t. A break won’t hurt you. And you know you deserve it. We deserve your attention, too.”
Your heart cracks at his words. Even more at the way he looks, as you see that all he wants is to spend time with you. He’s been busy, too. He’s spent the last few nights at his studio, buried deep in his projects because he said he wanted to focus on you this week. And you know that he’ll keep his word like he always does. Jungkook is dedicated to his work but he focuses on you when he says he will. You’re the one not loyal to what you say.
“Kook, I’m—”
“Just do what you have to do,” he interjects, his eyes downcast now. “I’ll be outside with Jimin. Come out when you’re done. You like it here, so don’t worry. We won’t leave until you’ve come down.”
Jungkook exits the car before you can say anything. You watch him walk down the stony path towards the ocean.
You hadn’t even realized you’re here.
You’re at Cheongsapo, with the pebble beach just meters away being one you all went to as kids. Jungkook’s older brother used to drive you here during summer, and you all enjoyed the calmness of the place. You used to bet on who would treat ice cream by playing rounds of stone skipping, with Jimin winning every single time. You remember how you and Jungkook taught each other how to do it, and then tag-teamed against your brother so he could finally treat you both that one time.
Whenever you’d visit Busan during your college breaks, you’d always come down here with your friends, with Jungkook and Jimin in tow. You’d visit at sunset and hold out your sparklers, then navigate the terrain at night and laugh about who tripped and slipped on the way back.
Jungkook’s right. You like this place. It holds so many memories of your youth, and you find yourself constantly reminiscing, as you try to recall his place in your life back then.
You mentally smack yourself. He didn’t deserve your dismissal. He didn’t deserve the way you spoke to him. He’s been trying to help, especially with how busy you’ve been these past several weeks. You were supposed to work from home while you housesat your parents’ house but Jimin convinced you to take your untouched leaves when Jungkook decided to come, and then they both called it a mini-break.
And maybe you need it, considering that all this preoccupation with work has caused you to snap at your boyfriend when all he wanted to do was ease your mind.
So you get out of the car and head to him.
There’s a small forest to pass through and a steep staircase to maneuver, but you manage. You look out to see Jimin already throwing stones and Jungkook standing by, reacting to every gliding pebble on the water. You spare a few seconds to admire him from the back, with his plain white shirt and light gray lounge pants, accentuating a figure that has you weak in the knees. His hands are in his pockets and his slightly long locks are in a half-bun, and he looks every bit of comfort in this place that holds so much of your years growing up.
You walk to where he is and wrap your arms around him from behind. He stills but he doesn’t say anything. You savor his natural scent and the way the tips of his hair tickle your face. You bask in the taut figure that somehow softens under your touch. Once you feel him relax a little, you tilt your head and whisper in his ear.
“I’m sorry for snapping at you. You didn’t deserve that.”
He remains quiet and unmoving. All you can hear are the sounds of the waves and Jimin’s cheering from some meters away.
“I just got caught up with work but I’m done with it. It wasn’t right of me to neglect you when I promised I was gonna take a break and spend time with you,” you continue.
Your voice is low and Jungkook could hear your pout. Just a little bit more and he’ll give in.
“You look so hot today and I just want to—”
“Yah!” He whines, finally returning your affection and caressing your arms that are now wrapped around him tightly. “Don’t tease me.”
“Hmm, that caught your attention, huh?” You giggle, lightly kissing his neck.
He shivers at the act, and he laughs at himself for how whipped he is for you, giving in so quickly.
“You know it would,” he huffs, turning around to face you now.
You still have that pout and he just wants to kiss it off you.
“How was walking down the steep staircase?” He asks, knowing that was your only non-favorite thing about this place.
“I tripped on a step but I’m fine,” you proudly smile now.
“You should’ve called me,” he frowns now.
“But you were upset with me!”
“So? Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t help you down the stairs and risk you tripping. You know how those steps are. And the pebbles can sometimes be slippery. You can trip here, too, and— what?”
“Nothing. You’re sexy when you’re worried about me,” you say nonchalantly.
“Ugh, come here,” he groans, pulling you in a hug, one that you fall into immediately. “I’ll always worry about you. And I’ll always help you, even if I’m upset.”
“I know,” you sigh. “I’m sorry again. But I’ve laid off the report now. I told Mr. Soo I shall not be disturbed anymore for the rest of my leave.”
“Good,” Jungkook hums, pulling away to face you now. “Because I really want to know what you wanted to do.”
“Ah, many things, Jeon Jungkook,” you smirk. “But I’ll maybe settle for this first.”
You lean in and kiss him - deep enough to have him moan against your lips, and you suddenly can’t wait until you can do more.
“Oh, my eyes!” Jimin squeals, prompting you to look at him with his arm covering his face.
Jungkook only laughs but you scowl at your brother.
“You’re so dramatic,” you roll your eyes. “You’ve seen worse.”
“And I’ve erased that image of my sister and my best friend swallowing each other’s faces from my mind. Please don’t remind me again,” he groans. “But anyway, are you tolerable again?”
“Yes,” you frown. “I think,” you mutter, turning to Jungkook.
“You’re alright,” he teases, before he wraps his arm around you and pulls you close. “Now Jimin here wants to reassert his dominance as the stone-skipping king. You game for a match?”
“Do I have a choice?” You cock your eyebrow.
“No. So okay, same rules,” your brother announces. “Loser treats everyone to coffee and pastry. We all know it won’t be me.”
“Brat,” you say under your breath.
But he’s not wrong. He dominates and Jungkook ends up losing. The wink he makes tells you he let you win. And though you like to play fair, you won’t lie and say his teasing smirk definitely turned you on.
You spend the rest of your morning enjoying iced coffee while overlooking the beach, then you head to your favorite seafood restaurant for lunch. You go to your usual market for ingredients for the week, including tonight’s dinner that your mother will be preparing. She wanted to cook for all of you before they flew out, she said, and that got you excited.
It’s refreshing to walk through the streets and spots of your childhood and reminisce with your brother and boyfriend. The memories take on different forms this time, as Jungkook tells you things from his perspective.
You remember that one time you scolded them for sneaking out on a school night and then picking them up at an alley with Jin driving you. Jungkook says he liked how caring and understanding you were then; you said you’d cover for them after flicking their foreheads.
There’s that summer when you got your friends to buy from Jimin and Jungkook’s ice pop stand so they could buy these skateboards that neither of your parents wanted to get for them. Jungkook recalls how you complimented his recipe and told everyone he made them so that they’d praise him, too.
There’s that winter when, after your brother’s begging, you had him and Jungkook join you and your friends’ bonfire night at one of your secret beach spots. Jungkook points out that you always made sure that as the youngest ones there, they were warm and well-fed.
And then there were their sleepovers when you’d join them play video games and watch horror movies in the living room. Jungkook gushes at how pretty you looked and how you’d always prepare them popcorn and drinks. He outs you as the one who puts the blanket over him and Jimin when they fall asleep on the couch.
“I tend to forget a lot of things but I remember when they’re about you,” he mumbles as he starts the drive to your house. “It’s just always stuck with me. Please don’t be weirded out.”
You giggle but assure him that you aren’t. You understand him - there are things and people and moments that naturally stick with you, and they’re the ones you hold dear, too.
He was a kid with a crush and his attention was often on you, and you suppose that given how you’d felt comfortable around him then, it was also maybe natural that you’d feel the same way now that you’re both older. It just so happened that he ended up looking as attractive as he did, and that’s just an added bonus.
Jungkook drops you and Jimin home before he drives three blocks away to his parents’ house. He’ll greet them first before heading to your place, he says, excited for your mom’s cooking that he always enjoyed.
It’s been some time since you last saw them. They don’t always drive out to Seoul, only doing so to watch Jimin’s shows, and you haven’t had time to go home, either. Plus, you had an injured brother to take care of, and he’s also really the topic of every conversation you’ve had with them these past months.
And there are no bad feelings there. He’s had injuries and illnesses that had them worried, and you’re pretty much as unproblematic and predictable as any eldest child could get. You think you’re that monotonous or unexciting, too, and you suppose that just meant they didn’t feel the need to check on you as much as they did with Jimin.
But you express your longing once they offer you their hugs. You say how you miss your mom’s cooking and your dad’s baking, which is code for saying that you’ve missed them, too.
You get your stuff to your room and sigh in relief at the comfort it still gives you. Not much has changed between your double bed, your desk, your beanbag, and the large cork board of photos on your wall. You pin the Polaroids from earlier, deciding to keep the ones of you and Jungkook for your place back in Seoul.
You huff this time, unsure how you’ll open the discussion of you dating your younger brother’s best friend to your parents. They’ve known him since he was a kid; they watched him get into all kinds of trouble with their son, and were there for his milestones, too.
Jungkook was always Jimin’s partner-in-crime; they were two peas in a pod who went through everything together. Now it’s you and him and you don’t really know how they’ll take it.
But you brush it off for now and think it’s a conversation for later, or maybe when they come back from their trip. You intended on telling them in person, which is why they’re still in the dark. It’s just a matter of how you’ll say it.
You head downstairs and take in the scent of seafood soft tofu stew. The two boys are already at the kitchen counter, munching on the rolled omelet that they shouldn’t even be having yet. But your mom lets them, as Jimin talks about his new agency and shows videos of him doing some choreographies.
You stand next to Jungkook, who sneakily feeds you. You don’t know why you get flustered at the act, even more when he whispers in your ear.
“So, I finally get to see your room with your permission,” he cheekily smiles. “I promised Jimin a few rounds of Overwatch before going to you.”
You merely laugh and tell him that your dad’s asking him something.
“So, Jungkook. How has work been? Jimin tells us you’ve been getting more projects recently,” your old man asks.
“Ah, yes, uncle,” he responds. “I’m getting more clients and exposure now. It took a while but it’s all going well.”
“That’s good. Although I always wondered why you never thought of joining a firm. Doesn’t that mean a more consistent client base? And better for you financially, too.”
“Well, I get to choose my clients and my projects as a freelancer,” Jungkook explains. “I control my time. And it allows me to take appointments at the tattoo parlor.”
“Oh, right, your hobby,” your dad nods. “I guess having multiple sources of income is the new trend these days.”
Jungkook just hums in agreement, already used to your dad’s frame of thought when it comes to a career. So are you, because it’s often the first thing he picks up on with your boyfriends. Each of your partners just happened to be working in corporate so there was never this line of questioning followed by an awkward silence.
But Jungkook is just your brother’s best friend, as far as they know. You wonder how they’d react once you finally tell them the truth.
You don’t completely fault your dad, though. It’s less about judgment and more about practicality. He and your mom came from the generation that believed survival and security mattered more than passion. They always thought the latter could come later on in life, which is why they opened their own cafe not long ago, at a time when they were already pretty secure. You suppose it’s his way of looking out for you, which is why he’s always been concerned about your partner’s occupation.
The conversation changes, as the focus now turns to your parents and what they’ve been up to. You assist your mom in the kitchen while the men hang around, helping when they’re called upon. Jungkook stands near you, asking if you need him and attempting to feed you with a dumpling this time, but you manage to feed yourself and he merely looks at you in understanding.
Dinner is finally ready and you all head to the dining table. You take the seat next to your mom, across from Jungkook, and he looks at you curiously but you offer him an apologetic smile. You only told him that you’ll tell your parents about your relationship in person, which you planned on doing.
That is, until your parents bring up your friends.
“Sweetie, Jin’s son is so adorable,” your mom chirps. “I saw the pictures on Facebook and the little one took after his father so much. I can imagine how happy he and his wife are.”
The topic of your dear friend and his family injects energy into you. You say how Jin’s been bragging about his mini-me but that the nursery you helped put together looks so beautiful. You were all there when his wife gave birth a few weeks ago and though you’re still unsure about having kids, you won’t deny how much it warmed your heart when Seo-yoon’s tiny fingers wrapped around your thumb. It’s not something you say though, as your mom eventually mentions Na-eun and her fiancé.
“I read that he’s been promoted as Director of their company,” she says.
Your dad pipes in that So-Hee’s new boyfriend is apparently the son of one of his former colleagues, and you’re quite frankly over the conversations about your friends’ partners. The insinuations aren’t lost on you.
“How do you even know these things?” You groan.
“Facebook,” your mom replies. “Of course I’m friends with all your friends. And it’s nice to know how well they’re doing since we don’t get to see them much anymore. You’ve reached that age of settling down, after all.”
“I guess,” you hum, no longer interested in the conversation. Jimin’s roll of his eyes tells you he feels the same. “Lots of good things are happening for them.”
You don’t mean to sound bitter and you aren’t. You adore your friends and genuinely love that things are looking out for them. You’re not the same person from months ago who felt lost and falling behind amongst them. Sure, things could be better career-wise, but you haven’t felt this much security in yourself and your relationship until Jungkook. Explaining why is a different thing altogether.
“What about you?” Your dad asks. “I know we’ve been calling every week to ask about your brother but we haven’t been checking in on you. I’m sorry, dear,” he continues, his eyes softening. “Is there anything new in your life?”
If the earlier conversations hadn’t happened, perhaps you’d willingly hint on the newest thing in your life, which is the relationship you have with the man currently looking at you with his doe-eyes in anticipation.
But they did, and you know mentioning your friends’ partners was their way of subtly pressuring you about being with someone of similar stature. And you’re not really in the mood for that right now.
So you end up doing the stupidest thing you possibly could, and that’s to lie.
“Not really,” you say, hating the prolonged silence that follows.
And as you look at Jungkook across from you, you see his face fall, and you hate even more that it’s because of you.
Your lack of a follow-up prompts your parents to move on. They know that when you’re in the mood to talk, you will and when you’re quite passive, it means you aren’t.
Your mom turns to Jungkook instead and asks him what else he’s up to other than his various jobs and looking after Jimin. He looks at you before his gaze shifts towards them.
“Not much else, auntie,” he replies.
The crack of your heart knows you completely messed up, because if it stings like this, then you know it hurt him even more.
“Oh, is there no one special in your life?” She asks, as she often does. Given that she treats Jungkook as part of the family, she’s lost all filter when it comes to him, too. “I recently met with my friend and her daughter. She’s such a lovely young woman, Kook, she’s brilliant and oh so charming. She’s in Busan for the week, too. Do you want to—”
“Is it time for dessert?” Jimin butts in, not wanting this conversation to continue.
He knows Jungkook wouldn’t know how to turn your mother down, and if he even slightly entertains the idea to appease her, you’d be the one upset, even if you technically put this upon yourself. Jimin already sees you a bit uncomfortable, and if there’s anything he can do to not make this worse for you and his best friend, it’s to be a brat.
“Oh, yes. Your father made an apple pie and some ice cream,” she says. “Let me—”
“I’ll get it,” you offer, standing up from your seat now.
You don’t want to know what your mom’s other propositions would be. You’re sure she’ll find some person’s son to match you with, given that she’s done that a few times after your breakup with Namjoon. You’re also not ready for Jungkook to agree with her about meeting someone, even if you know he won’t mean it.
Which is really stupid because if you’d just told them the truth, then you’ll be having a completely different conversation, although you’re unsure if you’re ready for that one, too. But at least Jungkook wouldn’t look as upset as he does right now, as he’s resorted to picking on his food instead of finishing it, which tells you that he’s lost his appetite and that’s never a good thing.
You go to the kitchen to slice the pie and scoop the ice cream. You do it so slowly to lengthen the time before you’re back there, only because you don’t want to know what else they’re talking about.
You’re in the middle of cursing yourself when you feel the sting of a tiny pinch on your arm, and you yelp in pain and smack your brother’s chest in reflex.
“Ow!” You yell, frowning at the man before you and ignoring your mother’s order to “behave,” even if they’re used to you two quarreling.
“You deserve that,” Jimin scowls at you. “Because what the fuck was that?!”
“I know,” you sigh, glancing at Jungkook who’s trying his best to be interested in what your parents are saying. “I… froze. You know what they wanted to hear, Chim. All those things about my friends’ boyfriends and what they do? I just didn’t want them to compare them to what Jungkook does if I tell them.”
“Why, what’s wrong with what he does?” Your brother raises an eyebrow.
“Nothing. It’s just… you know how focused they are on career stability and shit like that,” you try to explain. “You heard what dad was telling him earlier. I just didn’t want Jungkook to hear any underhanded comments from them and then feel bad about it.”
“And you think denying that you’re dating is any better?” He chides. “That’s literally worse!”
“I—”
“Jungkook knows how our parents are. And after you got together, he already anticipated that they’d question how he’ll be able to sustain your life together once you told them about your relationship,” Jimin explains. “He was ready for it. I doubt he anticipated this…”
You stand there, the crack in your heart getting deeper and bigger as the seconds pass. You hadn’t realized that Jungkook was already confiding in Jimin about any concerns he’d have about facing your parents. You suppose he would, given that you said you’d tell them when you saw them the one time that Jungkook asked if they knew, and you didn’t raise it again after. Living in your bubble together seemed more important, and you’d forgotten to mentally prepare yourself for this conversation.
“Chim, I fucked up,” you pout.
If it were about anything else, Jimin would push it. It’s how you always were, and you’ve reached that point in your relationship where you could call each other out and know it comes from a good place. But he doesn’t want to do this today, not when you’re already sad and guilty and he doesn’t want you to feel worse. He doesn’t want to take sides, even if he’ll admit that you were in the wrong, but he doesn’t want to antagonize you either.
“Hey,” he nudges your arm. “It’s not the end of the world. You’re both gonna figure it out. I don’t know how hard he’ll take this but he’s a really soft-hearted person, so just… keep that in mind, okay?”
You nod, wanting to believe that you’ll be able to fix it.
“And don’t hate yourself too much,” your brother adds. “He’s really, really into you. I just know he won’t be able to resist you.”
You nod again but you think that just makes it worse. You doubt he expected that out of all the people to disappoint him, it would be you. Yet here you are.
You and Jimin return to the table with the plated desserts. You hand one to Jungkook but he doesn’t acknowledge you. He doesn’t meet your eyes either when it’s all you try to do. He peacefully eats his apple pie while you feign interest at your parents talking about their recent weekend at a spa.
When everyone’s done, he helps Jimin clean up. It’s how you know that Jungkook’s considered part of the family, as your parents don’t stop him from doing so, unlike when it comes to other guests or your friends.
You watch helplessly as he washes the dishes, turning down your offer to help. You take the rest of the plates and walk towards him instead, standing close so you could place them in the sink. He just moves his arms to give you space then returns to his task, not sparing you a glance.
You stay with your parents in the dining area to talk about their trip. They leave you with important documents and give you instructions should anything bad happen to them while they’re away, as they always do whenever they go on a trip. Everything is your responsibility as the eldest, they remind you.
They finally go to their room to continue packing and you sit on the corner of the couch where Jimin and Jungkook have just finished watching some video of a guy reacting to other videos. You constantly glance at your boyfriend but he seems to be intent on not giving you attention because he’s not like this - he always wants to be close to you, needing his hand to be touching your arm or your thigh or even your hair, and his pretty eyes locked on you. But not tonight.
You recall how months ago, you avoided him because of what you started to feel. And perhaps this is how he felt then - helpless, unsure, and desperate for you to be next to him again.
You find the tiniest bit of courage and call out his name, hoping he’d at least turn to you this time.
“Kook, I’m—”
“Hey, we should probably play now so we finish early,” Jungkook nudges Jimin’s knee. “It’s been a long day; I don’t really want to stay up late.”
Your brother looks at you in apology as he responds to the man on his left in agreement. They both head up, leaving you rooted in your seat, wishing that Jungkook would turn around to tell you that he doesn’t mean creating this distance, but he doesn’t.
And you wouldn’t blame him. You’d stay away from you, too.
You end up watching Aliens on your own, crouched on your corner of the couch with the large blanket over you. You give up after an hour, once the movie starts getting intense and scary though. There’s no Jungkook to hold you during the jumpscares, or to tease you about your screaming, or to assure you that he’ll protect you from all types of monsters.
There’s no Jungkook next to you but you want him there, and it’s another half hour later when you decide that you’re not going to bed without speaking to him.
You hate sleeping sad and upset. You don’t like ending the day not being on good terms with him. There are so many things you want to tell him but more than anything, you just want to hold him close. He always said he liked that, because even during the times when there’s so much to say or feel, falling into each other’s arms is the easiest thing to do. It says enough. It shows enough. And you’ve both survived misunderstandings and stressful moments by holding each other, and then holding each other closer.
Walking up the stairs and towards Jimin’s room, the nerves kick in. Jungkook has been ignoring you the whole evening and you’re unsure if he’s willing to hear you out.
But you try, as you knock on the door, your heart beating fast when it slowly opens. Your brother’s downcast eyes meet you and you don’t need to say anything else.
He opens the door wider then turns to the man lying on a mattress on the floor.
“Kook, my sister’s looking for you.”
You glance at him, dressed in that black tank top that always made you breathless, but once again, he avoids your gaze. But he does stand up after a nudge on the foot from your brother and walks over to you.
“Can we, uh…” you gesture towards the room just across the hallway.
He doesn’t say anything but he doesn’t shut you out, which is a good thing. You take it as your cue to start walking and you hear his footsteps right behind you.
You let him in then close the door behind him. There’s so much you want to say, like you’re sorry and that you were stupid, that you didn’t mean to deny him but that you didn’t know how to tell your parents, or what you were even nervous about. You want to say that you just want to spend tonight wrapped up in his arms and apologizing in all the ways that you can.
But instead of uttering the words, your throat dries up. Seeing him standing there with that upset and disinterested look on his face breaks you a little. So you reach out, your hands pressing gently on his chest to try to feel him, to be close to him, hopefully to hold him and make your mistake go away.
“Kook, I…” you tremble, trying so hard to find the words.
Jungkook looks back at you, your face nervous and unsure, unlike his that’s probably still painted with disappointment.
He still doesn’t know what to make of your denial. He’s been trying to see things from your point of view all evening, but doing so only in his head because verbalizing them, especially to his best friend, makes it sting a bit more. Maybe Jimin can explain on your behalf but that would just confirm to Jungkook one of two things - that you don’t really intend on telling your parents about both of you for whatever reason he can’t comprehend, or you don’t think he measures up to their expectations and for that, you might just think he’s not good enough for you.
He doesn’t think he’s ready for that, so he shuts Jimin down when he asks. They watched videos earlier to have something to laugh about but he was faking it. He suggested playing a game just so he wouldn’t respond to you calling him earlier but all they’ve done since going to the room is lie in silence.
Jungkook doesn’t want to talk about it with his best friend. And he certainly doesn’t want to talk about it with you. He doesn’t want an explanation right now. It’s not what he wants to hear.
And it seems as if it’s something you’re even struggling to give him, as you stand there quivering, your hands slowly trying to pull him closer to you.
It’s what you usually do when you can’t find the words to express something - when you’re stressed and frustrated, when you want to patch things up after a small misunderstanding, when you want his comfort. And he always loved it when you did. He always willingly gave you that hug and that kiss and those whispers of “it’s okay” and “we’re okay” and “I’m just here.”
But not tonight, not when there’s this unnamed thing that’s eating him inside, and not even you can fix it.
“I don’t… I don’t really wanna do this right now,” he mutters, taking your hands to slowly slide them off him.
The look of hurt in your eyes is one that’ll probably haunt him for a while, but he’ll learn to deal with that. It’s better than talking with you about something that you don’t even know how to express.
This isn’t like him. It’s not like him to be upset at you like this, to not want to comfort you, to not want to be around you. This messes him up, too, and all he can do is step away and walk out.
He doesn’t really wanna be here, he thinks to himself as he enters the room just across, to the surprise of Jimin who half expected both of you to have made up. Jungkook would go home if he only brought his keys and it wasn’t too late to ask his parents to open the door for him.
But his best friend’s floor mattress will do for now. And so Jungkook puts on his earpods and plays whatever music is loud enough to shut out the thought of you until he falls asleep.
In the other room, you lay in your bed in complete silence. You don’t want to cry, only because he’s not there to wipe your tears away. And you don’t ever want to know what that’s like, so you don’t. You keep the tears at bay and force yourself to drift away.
You jerk awake the next morning to your mother knocking on your door. You promised to do errands with her today, so you get off the bed and yell out that you’ll just fix up.
“No rush, dear. I’m still having breakfast with your father. You can join us when you’re ready.”
You head down and eat the pastries that they brought from the cafe. You don’t have much appetite and these will suffice, but your mind goes to Jungkook and how he was craving kimchi fried rice and spam yesterday.
So that’s what you make for him and Jimin. You even prepare iced coffee the way they like it. You’re about to set the dish aside for them to heat up when you hear rushed footsteps down the stairs and you know they’ve woken up.
“Wahhh, it smells so good,” Jimin exclaims as he walks over to the counter while his best friend sits on the table. “Did you make something, dad?”
“Oh, your sister cooked for you and Jungkook,” your father hums. “It’s making me hungry now.”
“There’s still some in here if you want,” you call out, with him responding that he’ll get some later.
You serve the dish in two bowls. You hand one to Jimin and then place the other in front of Jungkook without sparing him a glance.
“Iced coffee is in the refrigerator,” you tell them.
You hear Jimin’s little squeal before he gets them. “Where you off to?” He asks.
“I’m running errands with mom.”
“Make sure you two make it in time for dinner, okay?” Your father says.
“Of course. I can’t miss your steak, dad,” you give him a small smile.
“Good. I prepared meat good enough for five Actually, six. I count Jungkook as two people,” he laughs.
The thought of this comfort and familiarity hurts you because you’re the one who made Jungkook think otherwise. You see him smile at your father’s remark but you turn away when he looks your way. You know he’s still upset and you don’t want to force it if he’s not yet ready to speak with you. You also haven’t gotten over the way he pulled away from you last night, and so looking at him today is a little difficult.
“You’re still joining us at the party, right?” Jimin asks.
Their friend, Hari, whom you know briefly dated Jungkook in high school, is celebrating her birthday tonight. Their group always looked to you as the cool sister so you’re always invited to whatever they’ve got going, and while the three of you talked about attending later, after what you did, you doubt Jungkook would want you to spoil his evening. You’re also not exactly in the partying mood for obvious reasons.
“I’ll pass, Chim,” you respond. “You guys should have a best friend night.”
You go back to your room to fix up before joining your mother to head out.
Back in the dining room, Jimin nudges Jungkook’s knee.
“She’s still playing favorites,” he playfully rolls his eyes as he gestures to the generous amount of spam in his best friend’s bowl compared to his decent serving.
Jungkook just hums, guilt forming that he didn’t even thank you for this because he really has been craving it. Before any of them could say anything more, your father speaks up.
“Your sister okay, son?”
“Uh, yeah? Why wouldn’t she be?” Jimin nervously answers.
“She just doesn’t seem like herself, that’s all,” your old man replies.
“Maybe it’s work. It’s been tough lately,” your brother reasons.
“But she’s more tired and frustrated when it comes to work but that’s not what she is. Maybe it’s a guy.”
At this, Jungkook chokes on his food, and he’s glad your father doesn’t react.
“What makes you think so?” Jimin asks, his eyes flitting to his best friend.
“Hmm, it just seems different,” your father insists. “Or maybe it’s just wishful thinking on my end. She hasn’t introduced anyone since Namjoon. And I wish she would, just so we know she’s moved on, you know? And that the breakup isn’t still hurting her.”
“She has, and it doesn’t affect her anymore,” Jimin confirms, certain of at least that bit.
“Then why hasn’t she introduced anyone yet?”
“Maybe it’s because you really liked Namjoon, and he seems to be your standard so ___ is just probably just taking her time.”
“Well it’s because he’s smart and stable and very self-assured and—”
“Also very much married. And a soon-to-be father,” Jimin interjects, already being protective of you.
He wonders now if this is how your parents talk about him to you, and that you’ve always just protected him from all of it.
“Oh,” your father sighs. “It could’ve been her.”
“But it isn’t and that’s totally fine,” Jimin exclaims. “She’s young and she’s got time. And who knows, maybe that’s not the life she wants, or at least not yet? If you could accept my version of happiness, you should be able to accept hers, too. And what does ‘stable’ even mean?”
“Someone with ambition, with a direction,” your old man explains. “Someone who’s secure and financially capable of sustaining this good life that your mom and I gave you both.”
“Those are all the things she is, too, you know?” Jimin frowns. “And also, I love you, dad, but you’re old. By that I mean your thinking is old. It’s outdated. You think stability is about prestige and money and I get that but… that’s not everything. There are other things that matter to her and if you lessened the pressure a bit, you’d see that. She’s your daughter, don’t you want her to be happy? To be loved?”
“Of course I do,” your father sighs.
“Well then don’t let your version of what a good partner is dictate her life,” Jimin advises. “She’s a grown up, she knows what she wants and how to get it. But she’s also your daughter who doesn’t want to worry or disappoint you. What if she’s found someone who makes her happy and treats her right but she’s nervous of what you’d think because of all these expectations you have of her?”
Jimin’s eyes flit to his best friend again who’s quietly munching on his food but is clearly taking in this exchange. While Jimin still thinks you were wrong to deny your relationship, he at least hopes that Jungkook could understand what was going through your mind and it was all this.
“Well if she has then I’d want to meet him,” your father insists.
“And maybe you will, once she stops feeling the pressure of what she’s supposed to be for you and who she’s supposed to date,” Jimin explains.
“I guess you’re right.”
“Of course I’m right, dad,” Jimin groans. “I lived with her for months and she just… she worries about a lot of things. It would be nice if she doesn’t worry about this. So please, stop with all the projections and underhanded remarks, okay? She sees right through you. Just let her live her life.”
A smile forms on your father’s face. It was never his intention to put all that pressure on you but he supposes you just accepted that it comes with the territory. But he realizes it shouldn’t be. His son’s right - he’s old. He and your mother worked hard so that you and your brother could have a life where you didn’t have to worry about anything, but he supposes the intention got muddled along the way. At least you and Jimin have each other.
“I know you and your sister don’t like to admit it but it’s really touching to see how similar you both are,” your father says.
“Excuse me, I’m cooler and funnier and definitely more talented,” Jimin pouts.
“Maybe,” your old man laughs. “But she’s sat on that same chair, lecturing me and your mom about letting you live your life and now you’re doing the same. She’s your biggest advocate and your biggest protector. It’s just nice to see how you’re the same for her.”
Running errands with your mother has always been your responsibility, but it’s once you’ve hit your late-twenties mark that you’ve come to appreciate it.
You learn a lot about the practical stuff like insurance and emergency funds and inheritance when you accompany her to the bank. You’re also reminded that sometimes you have to spend more to make things last when she drops off her clothes at the laundry service and picks up the bag and shoes she had professionally cleaned. You also remember the important things like buying flowers and leaving them on your grandparents’ graves.
You’ve just left the shopping center after she bought your father an anniversary gift, and her excitement over the satchel and perfume she got him has you smiling. You wonder how differently she feels for him 30 years later, and if this life they have together is everything she imagined it to be.
“Was it hard at the beginning? Being married to dad?” You ask.
“Of course, dear,” she answers. “Because it’s how marriages typically go. Your father and I were together for two years before we got married and it was a big change. You just… learn to consider another person, and you get used to someone always being around you.”
“It’s a good thing you can stand each other then,” you chuckle.
“That’s true,” she laughs back. “You’d be surprised to know how many married couples can’t. But we just always managed. And we had to be on each other’s side, you know? It’s the reason why we’ve lasted as long as we have.”
She looks quite emotional as she says the words and it’s probably because of what they’ll be celebrating soon but she turns to you with a smile.
“Your father’s parents wanted me to become a housewife, a stay-at-home mom who just ran the household,” she continues. “But I wanted to work so I could help my parents, and your father stood by my decision. He saw how working gave him financial freedom and he wanted that for me, too. And we just… worked hard. We fought a lot at the start because we were building our careers and raising a family but we knew it would all be worth it, as long as we stood by each other.”
“Then I suppose that’s what’s important in a partner, isn’t it?” You say. “Being dependable, being supportive, not… not what kind of career they have.”
“Well, a stable career helps,” she points out. “I mean, it’s how your father and I got to afford sending you and your brother to good schools. It’s how we could afford trips as a family and how your father and I can be secure at this age without needing much help from our children.”
“But that’s also because you worked hard, plain and simple. And you and dad had each other and overcame whatever challenges you faced together. You can’t say the same for all married couples,” you push.
“That’s true. I mean, it wasn’t like this during our parents’ time. I guess people had less options then. The world’s changed so much, hasn’t it?”
“It has,” you hum. “Not everyone cares much about their partner’s upward mobility and stuff like that. They want to savor the good life their parents gave them. And because they work hard, too, they just want someone to enjoy it with them. You know, like me.”
There’s a beat of silence as your mother processes your words.
“Is that why it didn’t work out with Namjoon?” She asks, reminding you that you’d only given them a general reason as to why things ended.
“We spent too much time planning for our future that we kinda lost our way,” you explain. “I guess that’s when I realized that I wanted someone to enjoy the moments with, regardless of what they do for a living. And we’ll never know what life will throw our way and I need someone who’ll stand by me, the way I’ll stand by them. You know, cheesy things like that.”
You smile to yourself as you think about Jungkook and his shameless affection that he shows in so many ways. You enjoy the cheesiness but you’ll deny it first before admitting it. But then again, he probably knows already. He pays attention to you after all.
“Well, I suppose that’s why we wanted to give you and your brother a good and secure life, so that you can enjoy it,” your mother hums.
“Exactly. You raised us well, mom. We’re not gonna throw our lives away, however we choose to live it, and with whom,” you assure her.
She gives you a warm smile. She takes your hand at the stoplight and caresses it. Perhaps it’s the assurance you need, too.
You return home to your father preparing the meat for tonight’s dinner. There’s a platter of steak, vegetables, and sausages that he’s seasoning to grill, and you can imagine how happy this is gonna make Jungkook. He always liked it when your dad prepared dishes like this paired with your mom’s spicy chicken soup, and you wish you could enjoy it together.
But you’re giving him space to feel what he feels and you’re doing the same, even if all you want to do is apologize. You haven’t had an issue quite like this, so things are a little unfamiliar to you. You tried to talk to him last night but he wasn’t ready, and you’re unsure when he will be.
You head towards the counter and cut up the vegetables for the soup before slicing the fruits. You’re focused on your task, knowing how sharp the knives are, but it’s at the same time that your brother and Jungkook arrive. Seeing your boyfriend look as good as he does in that denim jacket-over tank top fit is so sinful; it’s a crime you’re not talking that it distracts you, and it’s what causes you to slice through your finger and yelp in pain.
“Did you hurt yourself, dear?” Your mom asks as she stirs the pot.
“Yeah,” you say, placing your hand under running water.
You’re about to ask Jimin to get the First Aid kit from the drawer but Jungkook gets to it first, knowing where it is.
He knows that your brother, who’s terrified of blood, won’t help you, and despite your situation, Jungkook can’t stand not helping. So he lathers an antiseptic once the bleeding has stopped, then he wraps a band-aid around it. Just like him, you focus your gaze on your finger. Or maybe you’re stuck on the way he tends to you. Or the fact that this is the most physical touch you’ve done this past day when you normally can’t take your hands off each other.
He sighs to himself. If he wasn’t so hung up on his hurt feelings, he’d be able to tend to you better. This might not even have happened if he’d just spoken to you last night.
But he shakes the thought away. He’s still upset. But he’ll always want to take care of you; that’s the one thing that won’t ever change.
“Thank you,” you mumble, still not meeting his eyes.
“I’ll do this,” he says, waiting for you to step aside before he takes your place.
“Jungkook dear, do you mind helping me with the glazed potatoes after you finish that?” She asks.
“Sure thing, auntie,” he replies.
You watch him work around the kitchen the way he’s done so many times before, and your heart stings at the sight because you want to be doing this with him, with your parents, in your family kitchen. But it’s not like you could talk to him right now, not when you don’t know how to say what you want to say. So you head outside to where your dad is grilling the meat and help him instead.
It’s not long after when dinner is ready, and you’re seated across Jungkook again. It’s a little tense when you look at him when he looks away, but Jimin thankfully finds a way to keep the conversation light and focused on him.
Your parents insist that both men don’t need to help clean up, and Jimin asks you if you’re really not going.
“Yeah I’ll just… stay home, make sure mom and dad are packed well and just get everything in order for tomorrow,” you say, half lying.
“Gee, you make me look like a useless child,” Jimin pouts.
“You’re alright,” you hum. “You can drive them to the airport tomorrow.”
“But mom asked Jungkook to do that.”
“Well then you could just… make them a card or something,” you shrug.
Your brother sticks his tongue at you and you do the same.
“Fine, we’ll head out,” he announces.
“You guys have fun,” you say softly, glancing at Jungkook before walking towards the sink to do your duty.
You turn to your brother. “Call me if you need me to pick you up. No driving drunk, okay?”
He salutes you in response then heads out after Jungkook.
It’s uneventful after that. You help your parents with last minute packing then have a long shower. You lie on your bed and mindlessly watch some movie on your laptop hoping that you’ll fall asleep soon, and that when you wake up, you’ll find the strength to go to Jungkook and tell him that you’re sorry and that you don’t want to go another day without him.
“Hey, Jungkook. Dance with me.”
Jungkook looks up to find Hari and gives the same answer he’s given the last two times.
“Sorry, I’m injured,” he says.
She raises her eyebrow as if she doesn’t believe him and he can’t blame her; he doesn’t exactly know how to act like it.
“Oh, Jimin. There you are,” she chirps as the said man approaches the table. “Dance with me.”
“Sorry, I'm injured.”
“Great. It’s my birthday and I spot two hot guys in this party without girls around them and they’re fake injured,” she scowls. “What’s up with you two?”
“I’m not in the mood,” Jungkook shrugs.
“I’m babysitting,” Jimin says, gesturing at his friend. “But Mingyu and Eunwoo are right there. Go tell them to dance with you.”
“Fine. I’ll get in line then,” she rolls her eyes then walks away.
“How come no one believes me when I say I’m injured?” Jungkook asks as he munches on the fried chicken wings his best friend got.
“Because you’re a terrible actor. People believe me because I’m believable,” Jimin hums.
“They believe you because you posted all over social media that you hurt your ankle,” Jungkook corrects.
“Yeah but that was like, half a year ago.”
“Why are you even pretending you’re injured? You don’t have to stay with me, you know? Go to the dance floor and have fun. That’s your thing.”
“Well, maybe I’m also not in the mood because my best friend’s sulking,” Jimin frowns.
“Gee, I wonder why.”
“You know my sister’s sorry, right?”
“She’s ashamed, that’s what she is. And I’m just supposed to live with that.”
Jimin sighs as he watches his best friend mindlessly stare out onto the dance floor. Jungkook’s probably trying to rid himself of the image of both of you dancing and kissing and having fun if you were here. He could be making sense of what he feels, or his mind could also just be completely blank right now.
But what Jimin knows is that another glass of whiskey is something that Jungkook shouldn’t be having, so he stops his best friend from ordering another one.
“You might get drunk and then you’ll call or go see her and then you’ll say things you’ll regret and then you’ll hurt her and you’ll get even more hurt and you’ll have a harder time fixing things and then it just won’t stop and you’ll feel stupid because you’re not talking over something you could easily fix,” Jimin heaves.
It’s a lot to process but Jungkook knows that Jimin’s right. He’ll just get too emotional and won’t be able to control himself and despite what he feels, hurting you is the last thing he wants.
So he orders water instead, finishes it, then heads for the door.
“I don’t wanna be here anymore,” he says. “I need to get some air.”
They end up at a park, the one that you used to hang at with your friends in high school. Jungkook knows because he always accompanied Jimin there when you’d tell him where to meet you. It’s peaceful at this time of night and much more beautiful, too. It’s no surprise he keeps thinking that you’re right next to him, with your head on his chest and laughing at his jokes.
“Why is this affecting me so much?” He wonders out loud. “Why am I so hurt and so stubborn?”
“Because she said something she shouldn’t have. But also because you put her on a pedestal,” Jimin answers. “She made a mistake, and you’re free to fault her for it. I mean, anytime someone we care about hurts us, it sucks like hell. But you also have to think that maybe it’s affecting you as much as it does because she’s always been faultless in your eyes and she isn’t.”
The reality is a slap on the face, but one that Jungkook thinks he needs to have. You were everything he ever wanted and these past three months have been a bliss. But now that reality hits and you have to face the pressure that’s part of your life, your humanness is showing. And that’s what he’s always liked about you, isn’t it? The imperfections and the flaws? Now that those are affecting him, it’s affecting him hard, and he’s having a hard time getting over it.
“Maybe once you accept that she’s human and not just the dream you’ve had since forever, then you’ll realize that things like that happen but she never means to hurt you,” Jimin adds. “You can’t think that she does. You learn to work it out by facing it, Kook. You have to talk about it. You have to tell her it hurts and you have to listen to what she says, and then you forgive. That’s kind of how grownup relationships go.”
“Guess I’ve never had one before, huh?”
“Maybe they just didn’t mean enough to hurt you.”
“This means everything, then,” Jungkook sighs, as things get clearer in his mind. “Because I think what hurts more now is not being next to her.”
“Great! Then can both of you patch things up now?” Jimin beams, feeling hopeful. “I hate seeing both of you sad and so stupid. Plus, my parents are leaving tomorrow and you won’t have a buffer anymore. So please just talk.”
Jungkook admits feeling touched. He knows at the end of the day, Jimin cares about him and you more than anyone, and he probably misses being around both of you at the same time. Jungkook does, too, but he misses you the most and it’s only been a day.
“Tomorrow,” he says. “I don’t know what to tell her and it’s late. She might be asleep and—”
“Now you’re just making excuses,” Jimin crosses his arms.
“Well, what if I expect her to be the one to talk to me?”
“She tried but you didn’t want to, remember?”
“That was last night. The wound was still fresh,” Jungkook pouts.
“Oh god. I feel like I’m dealing with children,” Jimin groans.
“Imagine how we felt taking care of you,” Jungkook answers back.
“At least I was just one person,” Jimin rolls his eyes.
“Your dramatics were equivalent to two people though.”
Both men bicker as they walk back to the car. It started to drizzle so they decided to go back to their respective homes. Jungkook could stay over at your place and maybe talk to you if he really wants to but he’s seriously just chickening out over it.
He’s never had to make up with you because none of your previous arguments ever led to you not talking to each other, or him pushing you away. He’s never had to spend a day ignoring you. And now, there’s so much to say and so much to feel but he doesn’t know how to approach it. He’ll need tonight to sort himself out and then he’ll speak to you, maybe after he drives your parents to the airport. Or maybe on the way back.
He drops Jimin off; 30 seconds later, he’s home, too. You’re so close but so far away just like you used to be. But at least this time he knows that when the next day comes, he’ll have a chance to just pull you close and tell you he doesn’t want to be like this ever again.
There’s an incessant knocking on your door, and as you’re about to yell out that you’re asleep, you realize it might be Jungkook. You sit up on your bed and when the door opens and you see your brother instead, your face falls.
“It’s just me, unfortunately,” he says. “Kook’s back at his place.”
“Oh,” you sigh. “Why are you home so early? It’s like, 11.”
“Because after the third girl, his fake injury excuse wore off and people just didn’t believe him. We looked like losers sitting on the table eating chicken,” Jimin chuckles. “So we left after an hour then went to a park and I knocked some sense into him and now he’s not so upset anymore. And I’m here to knock some sense into you, too.”
“I already know I made a mistake, Chim. I’m… I’m so fucking stupid. I just… don’t want him to think that I’m ashamed of him or that I don’t think he’s enough or any of that. I mean I’m—”
“Crazy about him, right?”
“I kinda am,” you smile softly.
“Good, because so is he and he’s hoping you’d go talk to him even if he says he’ll talk to you tomorrow. Don’t waste time anymore and—”
You’re bolting off your bed and putting on your hoodie before your brother could finish his sentence.
“If mom and dad look for me, tell them I—”
“Got attacked by a clown in the sewer.”
You look at him incredulously then realize you’re wearing yellow then you frown.
“Just make up some excuse. I’ll… hopefully be back in the morning,” you say.
“Alright. It’s drizzling though so—”
And just like that, you’re gone.
It takes all but 10 seconds for the rain to pour, and your hoodie and sweatpants are no match for it. You groan at your brother for underselling the weather but then again, you also should be thanking him for telling you what you needed to hear - that Jungkook’s not so upset anymore and that he’s hoping you’d speak to him.
Much as you think you would’ve taken any chance today to patch things up, you also would’ve frozen in front of him. You suppose you needed to know he was ready for you, and if he wouldn’t tell you, then of course, Jimin would. You just really wish he had the foresight to know it would rain this hard but you’re probably asking for too much.
But Jungkook’s place is just a few blocks from yours so you power through. When you get there, you realize that you forgot your phone, so you make the stupid decision of climbing over the short fence and then hitting your cut finger in the process.
You have no time to feel pain though, as the next order of business is getting Jungkook’s attention. But before you can execute your plan of throwing rocks on his window, the front door opens, and you telepathically thank your brother who probably called your boyfriend to alert him that you’ll be arriving at his place wet from the rain.
“___, what are you doing here?” Jungkook asks with worry painted on his face.
“I just… I needed to come and see you,” you manage to answer.
His face softens and you feel the hope bloom in your chest. He pulls you inside by the wrist and instructs you to quietly go up the stairs. You’re at least not drenched but you still got wet, so he leads you to the bathroom to wash up. He tells you to wait as he gets you something to change in, and he returns after half a minute with a towel and a large shirt.
“Cream and band-aid, for your wound,” he says, placing them on the counter. “My room’s the second door to the right, in case you forgot.”
You take him in, in his black tank top and shorts, his tongue playing with his lip ring the way he always does when he’s nervous. You manage to nod before he heads out, and you take a quick shower and then pull his oversized shirt over you.
You quietly walk to his room, knocking on the door first before opening it slowly. It’s a bit dim but seeing him is all you need. After placing your clothes on the nearby chair, you look at him again.
He looks tired and worried. He also looks like he has so much to say but he doesn’t know where to start. There’s a hint of sadness in his eyes but there’s longing, too, and you suppose he’s mirroring how you look. You feel a lot. You also want to say a lot, but you don’t know where or how to start.
So you do the one thing you know often works. You approach him then wrap your arms around his torso. You fall into his embrace as quickly as he falls into yours, as he seems to have the same idea. You hold him tighter and pull him closer. You flush your cheeks on his chest while he buries his face on your neck. You grip his top and he does the same with yours. Your heart beats fast in longing and you feel his own do the same, too.
There’s so much to feel and say but this is all you can do. And right now, it’s quite enough.
You loosen your grip, but only so you could nuzzle his neck while your arms wrap around them. He feels so warm and he smells so delicate and he’s all you need.
“You knew I was coming?” You ask, turning to him
“Jimin said you were on your way without an umbrella and your phone,” Jungkook chuckles. But his face softens as he wipes the lone tear that falls down your cheek. “You’re lucky it wasn’t a typhoon or anything.”
“I had to get to you,” you mumble.
“He also told me he wasn’t subtle in telling you to come here.”
“Well, he did say you wanted me to talk to you. And I wanted to. I just wasn’t sure if you were ready to hear me out and I was… giving you space.”
“Yeah well, I don’t know what to do with that space without you there,” he sighs, his eyes shy and absolutely adorable.
“Neither do I,” you smile. “So, uh. Will you invite me to your bed, maybe fill that space and more?”
“Of course,” he laughs, taking your hand and leading you there.
You get under the covers and once he lies next to you, you scoot closer, hugging him again until you’re laying on top of him. But he doesn’t complain. He just hugs you back tightly, pulling you closer until he’s able to bask in your scent and the warm feel of you.
But despite the relief, you know you actually have to do the talking. You pull away and lay on your side. You take in his beauty and his softness and the way they make you feel like all is right again in the world. Your fingers trace his face, from his nose to his cheek to his lips, and he does the boyfriend thing of kissing your hand - including your cut finger - before wrapping it around his waist. He looks like he’s anticipating your words, too, so you try and hope they’re enough.
“Kook, I’m so sorry,” you start. “I… I have no excuse. I was being selfish and cowardly because I didn’t know how to tell my parents. I didn’t want to deal with what they’ll say about your job, knowing how they are and what they value and I just…”
“That’s for me to deal with though,” he says. “Because I chose this. And I’ve always known how they are but I still chose you.”
“It’s for us to deal with, and I did it so terribly,” you shake your head. “I don’t want you to think that I’m ashamed of you and what you do. That freedom, the ability to create… they’re things they don’t really understand. And I thought I knew how to make them. I just ended up denying us and that was so wrong. I’m so sorry.”
“I… I get it,” he responds, caressing your cheek now. “They worked so hard to give you this life and of course they want to make sure you’re taken care of. And for them, they only know of one way that could happen. I’d be naive to think they’ll just accept that the man who’s crazy about their daughter isn’t some corporate dude with secure employment and upward mobility in his career.”
He doesn’t miss your shy smile and the way you nibble your lip and that just triggers the butterflies in his belly.
“But that’s for me to show them that I can take care of you, and not because you can’t do it yourself but because I want to,” he adds. “I… I wanna be that person who makes things better and easier for you and who makes you happy.”
And who makes you feel loved, he doesn’t say. That’s a conversation for another day, he thinks.
“You do,” you assure him. “And I feel it everyday. You’re good at that, and I don’t tell you enough.”
“I know now,” he smiles, leaning closer to kiss you softly.
You return it but pull away. “Do you forgive me?”
“Of course I do,” he says, falling into the kiss that he gives again.
“Okay. I don’t wanna hurt you like that ever again.”
Your pouty face tugs his heart and he wants to tell you that none of that matters now because you’re back in each other’s arms, and that’ll always be enough for him.
He just hums as he goes for another kiss that’s deeper this time. And when you let him push you to lay on your back as you moan against his lips, his heart soars even more. He’s missed you, and it’s definitely going to be a long night.
He hovers over you now, and he shivers when your fingers graze his neck and then his chest. You open your legs to meet his hips, and the feel of your clothed cunt against him has his brain short-circuiting. He gets in the rhythm of grinding against you while he kisses your lips then your jaw then your neck, his hand now sneaking under your shirt to fondle your breast.
It’s when he sucks on that sensitive part near your ear that you yelp in pleasure, and he immediately covers your mouth with his hand while he giggles.
“Gotta keep it down babe,” he whispers. “My parents are in the other room.”
But he doesn’t stop his kissing and you don’t really want him to.
“It’s not like you’re making it any easier,” you moan as he pinches your pert nipple.
“I’m not and I won’t, but you gotta try,” he smirks before his lips trail downward.
You’re unable to say anything once his tongue swirls around your buds. His hands wrap around your breasts that he praises, that he kisses and licks before slowly letting them go to hold onto your waist this time. He presses open-mouth kisses down your torso, his lips in tandem with your underwear that’s teasingly being removed off of you.
You hear him let out a breathy moan as he spreads your legs wider.
And while you know that this tender-hearted man has a cheeky streak in him, you didn’t expect for him to have his finger against his lips to shush you, knowing what he’s about to do. His smug face turns you on even more, and your breath is caught in your throat once you feel his tongue flat against your flesh, warming it up before the tip of his wet muscle swirls around your nub.
But you go along with his request, biting back your moan, even as your pussy chases his mouth for more.
And it’s what he gives, as he dives in and sucks and bites your clit while his two fingers explore your hole. The cold of his lip ring is a contrast to how hot you feel, and it’s a sensation you can never get enough of. You whimper in silence but you manage to look at him, his eyes closed as he buries his face in your cunt.
“Look at me,” you whisper and he follows, his gaze meeting yours. “Fuu-uuck, Kook. You feel so good,” your voice quivers.
His mouth’s full but yours is hanging open. You cover yours with your free hand while the other pulls on his long locks. He’s enjoying this so much, you can tell with the way he squeezes your thighs and moans against your skin. He follows a pace that has your body shaking, straining in intense pleasure until it gives in. You let out a low scream as your orgasm hits, and he’s right there, riding out your high with you.
He cleans you up with his tongue and then makes a show of licking your essence off his fingers before kissing you again.
“You did good,” he teases, as he caresses your cheek.
You’re about to say that so did he when bucks his hip against yours, and the feel of his hard cock against your still wet cunt ignites another fire in you. He repeats it, and it’s what has you moaning again.
“Fuck baby, I told you to keep it down,” he says, continuing his movements.
You know you can’t help it at this point, not when he’s back to licking your neck and kneading your breast.
“Whatever. Not like this isn’t new to your parents or anything,” you say.
It’s a guess but you doubt you’re wrong.
“What? Fucking a girl in my room?”
“Yeah?”
“But you’re the first girl I ever brought in here,” he cocks an eyebrow.
“That’s uh, that’s kinda sweet,” you reply, your breath steadying now.
“Yeah and well, who gets to say they fucked their childhod crush in their childhood bedroom?” He smirks again. “I can.”
He’s back to kissing you and much as you enjoy this, the itch to feel him in your mouth overtakes you, and you take the chance when he trails down your neck.
“So, can this childhood crush suck your dick?”
“Yes, she can,” he chuckles.
He removes himself from you and leans against his bed frame. You get on your knees and pull off his boxers, salivating at the sight before you. You get on top of him, your damp lips gliding against his hard cock and his mouth drops open, an invitation for you to do what you wish.
With your movements on his hips, you focus on his neck, licking up the smooth flesh and the protruding vein that has him biting back his moan. Then you kiss him, desperately and passionately, as you slowly remove his tank top and rest your hands on his chest.
It’s your turn to trail kisses down his torso now and you give every inch of him ample attention. But when you make it further down, there’s one part of him that deserves so much more. You tease him only a little, stroking his length and kitten-licking his slit, before swallowing him whole and swirling your tongue around and all over his cock. He’s hard and thick and everything you want inside of you.
You hold back a gag while he holds back his whimpers. You stroke him relentlessly so you could watch his mouth hang open and his strained body almost folding in pleasure as his thighs tighten in your hold.
“You like that, baby?” You hum.
“Fuck, baby, you feel so good around me. Fuck,” he keens, his voice quivering now.
You let his sounds guide you on how hard and how deep to go, but he’s the one who stops you, as he leans close and captures your lips in a searing kiss. He pulls you back on top of him to slide down his cock and the stretch makes you moan in his mouth.
He’s propped up on his arms for support while you move up and down, loving how he drags inside you in an angle that has your mind going hazy. You wrap your arms around his neck while he pushes upward to meet you, and somehow doing this while trying to be quiet is making the pleasure more intense.
It gets too much for Jungkook and he wants more. He wants to hit your deepest spots. He wants to be as close to you as he possibly can. He wants to swallow your moans and touch every part of your body and pleasure you in every way that he’s able.
So he pulls you off and lays you on your side, sliding back in from behind, with your one leg raised. The angle has you keening, even more when his one hand finds your breast and the other does its work on your clit. He pushes gently then roughly, no longer caring about the odd sounds the bed is making against his wall. He wouldn’t mind making up a reason to his parents if they ask him about it. Right now, all he wants is to reach his peak with you.
Your body is shaking in pleasure and overstimulation but you urge him, wanting to feel his seed inside you as well.
You lick his mouth. “Baby please, I want to feel your cum inside me,” you beg. “I want you so bad, fuck fuck.”
He loves it when you plead to him like this. He loves hearing what he does to you. He revels in the way your body molds into his, the way it aches to be close and to be one with him. His movements continue, and with his unrhythmic pounding against your pussy, he comes. You come right after, caused by his intense fiddling of your clit, and you feel like floating, your body in the clouds of pure pleasure.
But like always, he’s there with you, making sure you safely fall into a bed of hugs and kisses and warmth. He stays inside you as he softens, but his arms wrap around you, his face in your neck as he mumbles words of praise.
“Fifteen-year-old me would never believe this,” he heaves as he turns you over to face him.
You giggle in response.
“You’re crazy, you know that?”
“I do. It’s how I am with you. In the best way, of course,” he smiles his boyish smile, an interesting mix of innocent and cheeky.
“It’s the same with me,” you whisper, kissing his nose. “And 18-year-old me would never believe this.”
You wake up the next morning to the alarm that you set on Jungkook’s phone. Your parents are leaving early in the afternoon and they wanted to prepare breakfast for all of you, and it’s a meal with them that you’re excited and a little nervous to have.
You kiss the chest that your face is flushed against, and this elicits a groan from the man next to you.
“Good morning, babe,” you greet, shifting up to kiss his nose this time.
“G’morning,” he grunts.
“So, uh, we’re supposed to meet my parents for breakfast. And uh, I’m going to tell them about us.”
It’s what prompts him to finally open his eyes, and the softness in them makes your heart burst.
“Okay,” he smiles. “I hope it won’t ruin their trip or anything.”
“It won’t,” you assure him. “I… I tried to get through to my mom yesterday. You know, just telling her the things I value and stuff.”
“Hmm. Jimin did the same with your dad. I guess I won’t be such a disappointment now, huh?”
“Shush, you’re not even that,” you pout. “I think they’ll understand.”
He mirrors your smile and there’s a giddy feeling at finally - hopefully - seeing your parents be happy for you. So you get off the bed and sneak out of Jungkook’s bedroom to go to the bathroom.
You wash up quickly, only to make it to the hallway and find his parents standing there, wide-eyed as they look at you in surprise. You realize you’re only wearing Jungkook’s shirt that falls just above your knees and you try to cover whatever you can with your hands.
“Hi, uncle. Hi, auntie,” you shyly smile. “This, uh, this isn’t how I wanted to meet you.”
“Well, we don’t really mind,” Jungkook’s mother smiles. “We’re just glad you’re here. It’s been a while since we’ve seen you.”
“I know. I, uh, I wasn’t dating your son yet the last time I was here.”
“And that calls for a celebration, doesn’t it?” She giggles. “That boy has had a crush on you since forever. It’s funny he never believed that we knew. He wasn’t exactly subtle.”
“It’s not the first time I’ve heard that,” you laugh back.
You hear a door open and before you know it, large arms are wrapping around your waist and a mop of hair tickles your cheek. Jungkook grunts against your neck as he says that he’s finally awake, and you cringe at his parents’ amused faces.
“Kook, your parents are in front of us. This is so embarrassing.”
“Nah, they don’t mind. They’re cool,” he says.
“Yeah, and my parents aren’t,” you sigh.
“So, I’m guessing your parents don’t know yet?” His father asks.
Your pout prompts him to explain. “Well, the day after you got together, our lovesick son here told our family about both of you. But he said that you haven't told your parents yet so we’ve kept it from them ever since. It’s hard since we see them all the time but we managed.”
“Kook also told us about what happened,” his mother asks. “He was grumpy all day yesterday and we got him to tell us why he was so upset.”
“I’m sorry,” you pout again. “That wasn’t my finest moment.”
You feel Jungkook’s hold on you tighten, his way of telling you it’s all okay.
“It’s alright, darling,” she smiles. “We know how your parents are, and their reasons come from a good place. We tried to make this boy here understand them and you as well. Firstborns carry immense pressure to meet expectations; he just doesn’t get it because he’s the youngest. But it seems that it’s worked out with both of you, and we’re glad it did.”
“He couldn’t resist me,” you shrug, to his parents’ amusement.
“Uh, you’re the one who walked through the rain to come see me,” he reminds you, his head popping out of your neck now.
“You wanted me to.”
He tickles you in response and you’re all laughing in no time. It’s a different dynamic with his parents, as Jungkook always had a very close relationship with them. You saw it as a teenager and now, you get to be part of it, too.
They finally let you go and ask you to have dinner with them tomorrow, and that’s one meal that you’re definitely excited to have.
You push Jungkook towards the bathroom and then return to his room to dress up. It’s shortly after when you’re both walking the few blocks to your house, fingers interlocked as you give each other comfort.
You make it home and once you unlock the door, you can already hear laughter and clanking pots from the kitchen. You head there, meet Jimin’s smug face, and clear your throat to announce your presence.
“Oh, there you are. We were wondering where you were,” your mother says. “And hi, Jungkook.”
He greets your parents and from behind you, you take his hand again.
“I went for a walk… with Jungkook.”
He clears his throat and you backtrack.
“I mean, I, uh, was at his place. That’s where I slept.”
“Oh?” Your parents say at the same time, their eyes looking at you in confusion.
“He’s kinda my boyfriend.”
“Kinda? Babe, I think I’m more than ‘kinda’ your boyfriend,” he exclaims.
Your parents look shocked and next to them, Jimin is laughing in his seat.
“I mean, he is my legit, actual boyfriend,” you correct. “The new thing in my life that I denied is actually him. And the person who stands by me, who makes me enjoy the moments? That’s him, too.”
Their faces soften, and somehow that’s the comfort you need. Perhaps all the talking that you and your brother have done has gotten into them. You wouldn’t be surprised if they talked about it, too.
“Why didn’t you tell us, then?” Your mother asks.
“Because he’s not what you expected,” you sigh. “And I didn’t know how you’d take it.”
“Well, he is your brother’s best friend,” she points out.
“Who’s had a crush on me since he was a teenager,” you explain.
“That’s… not surprising,” your father laughs. “We could tell.”
“Oh my god, Kook. You are not subtle,” you elbow him. You turn back at them. “But I… I didn’t know how to tell you because you expect me to have a partner who’s part of your world, you know? And Jungkook likes his freedom. He likes his art and… he really likes me. And I happen to really like him, too.”
“He treats you well? Makes you happy? He’s someone you can depend on when things get tough?” Your father asks.
He smiles tenderly at you and you feel like crying.
“Yes, very much,” you nod.
“Then I think he’s everything we need him to be. A good partner, I’d say.”
You let out a sigh of relief. This is all you needed to hear.
“We’re sorry if you felt like you couldn’t be honest with us,” your mother shakes her head. “I guess we just needed some reminding of what we want for you and your brother. And well, Jungkook’s shown us his heart all these years. He’s always been a part of the family and he’ll be even more.”
They’re words that Jungkook didn’t expect would get him emotional, and he hugs you from behind just to steady himself. But it’s what makes your mother walk towards him for a hug, and your father surprisingly does the same.
“Alright, I guess it’s fitting to have this family breakfast together,” your mother says.
You all take your seats at the dining table, with yours being next to Jungkook now.
Jimin cheekily smiles. “Well, if this whole dance thing doesn’t work out, I guess I can just be a counselor or family therapist or something.”
“Just don’t call your clients ‘stupid,’” you roll your eyes.
“I won’t. That’s only reserved for you.”
And just like that, everything is as it should be.
You get through breakfast with lots of laughter, as you and Jungkook tell your own versions of the story while Jimin butts in to tell his own. It’s heartwarming to see your parents this way, especially when they tease your boyfriend about his crush on you growing up.
But even they admit that they’ve depended on him all these years, too, and that they don’t doubt his loyalty and commitment to you.
You share a tense moment with him after you all drop your parents to the airport, though. Jungkook has just unloaded all their things and as they hug you goodbye, your father teases.
“Just don’t welcome us home and tell us we're grandparents already.”
Jungkook dry laughs and so do you. That’s another topic for another day, you suppose, and while you’re still unsure of having a family, you just know it’s something you’ll both talk about.
You all get home soon after to wash up. Jungkook’s excited about how you’ll spend the day now that you’re both talking again, and you suggest hanging by the beach and then going out for dinner.
Jimin says he’ll stay home to let you two make up for the past two days and so he could have that online date with Taehyung, and you agree.
You and Jungkook end up having a really good day.
You go to a mall and walk around. He gets you a pair of stud earrings to commemorate the day you went official to your parents and you buy him a silver chain necklace for the same silly reason, but also because he looks really good in one and you want him to have more. It pairs real nicely with the shirt and joggers casual outfit he’s been sporting these past days, and the teasing look he makes after he puts it on reminds you of that one time his necklace was dangling on your face when he was pounding into you on your couch.
You get fruit drinks and snacks at the stalls you both used to buy from as teenagers, then you head to the beach where you lounge until sunset. You wade in the water, splash each other, and then make out when there’s no one around.
You feel so free and light, so young and hopeful. These are the moments you love having with him, the ones you like to enjoy and savor and have more of. And you know you’ll have them for the rest of this trip and when you get back to Seoul.
Jimin joins you for dinner at a burger place, then you all buy cup noodles and beer and head to your favorite park. It’s just like how most of your nights together go, just in the outdoors. You and your brother bicker and Jungkook referees; there’s also the occasional “you’re so cheesy” comment from you to your boyfriend and Jimin’s gagging sound.
You confirm plans for the rest of the trip. Your parents will be enjoying Hawaii for close to two weeks, and you have all that time to rest and spend time with your two favorite people. You’ll be off work. Jungkook has some projects to finalize while you do your own thing, and Jimin will be watching dance shows to get him inspired.
But there are more beaches and parks and villages to visit. There’s also that two-night stay at a resort you’ll be having. There are other sites and restaurants to go to, and you’ll be reliving your teenage years together while making new memories.
You’re now back at home, snug in Jungkook’s arms as he leans against the bed frame in your room, with you in between his legs.
“Today was a really good day,” you say, turning to him after he kisses your cheek.
“Today was amazing,” he hums.
He smiles as he replays the scenes of you shopping for each other, frolicking on the beach, and walking around your favorite spots. They’re all so simple and things you’ve done before but today felt so much more. There was a look in your eyes that held such tenderness and care for him. You held his hand as if you didn’t want to ever let go, as if you didn’t want him to.
“I really like you, Kook,” you mumble, almost like a confession, as if it’s not known. “I don’t know how else to say it.”
His eyes soften, as does his smile that he’s had on pretty much the whole day. But he just looks at you, and though you know he feels the same way, you want to hear him verbalize it again.
“Hey, say it back,” you nudge him.
“I love you though,” he says after a beat of silence.
You’re now the one who looks at him, unable to say a word.
“Are you that surprised?” He looks back at you nervously, nibbling his lip ring. “I mean, I think it’s quite obvious, just like everything I feel about you is.”
“Kook, I…” you try, but you don’t exactly know how to respond.
You don’t doubt his feelings but somehow you can’t help but think that maybe right now, he loves the idea of you and not you, and there’s a difference.
“I think I always have but I guess I didn’t realize just how much until this whole thing happened,” he continues, wanting you to understand what he feels. “I asked Jimin why it was affecting me so much and he said it’s because I put you on a pedestal. You were this dream I’ve had for so long that I admired from a distance and now I get to be with you and you’re… human, not some flawless being who doesn’t make mistakes. So when you hurt me, I faltered. That’s on me, too. Because I… I expected too much. And I’m sorry.”
His focus is on his hands that are playing with yours before he turns to you again.
“I realized that I wanted so badly for you to want me, that’s why it hurt. I wanted to be that person you cared for and trusted and needed because you’re all that for me. And when I saw you at my door last night, nothing else mattered but you,” he continues.
“Whatever misunderstanding or mistake or disagreement, I learned to accept them and I just wanted you, in my arms, so I could show you that you’re all I need. I’ve dreamt of you for so long and this version of you is more than I could’ve imagined. And I just… I love you, okay? It doesn’t matter how you feel. I just need you to know that I do, and I don’t think I’ll stop.”
Your heart is about to burst, and all you could do is cup his face in your hands and kiss him, hard and deep until you run out of air. You kiss him eagerly because you’re desperate for his touch. You kiss him passionately because there are things you feel that you can’t put into words yet, and this is how you tell him.
He’s quick to follow your pace, wrapping his arms around your waist as he helps you sit on his lap. Your fingers comb through his hair and grip his top and pull him closer, all while you grind against him and moan in his mouth.
But when he tucks a strand of hair behind your ear and caresses your cheek, you go tender.
“I love you so much,” he whispers against your lips, and all you feel is the warmth of his touch and how it’s all the comfort and security and stability that you need.
You slowly pull away and graze your nose against his. You don’t say anything else and he doesn’t expect you to. But you kiss his cheek and hug him, and you hear him sigh in relief.
He pulls away and cheekily smiles.
“You know, there’s a song for this.”
“A—what?” You laugh.
“A song.”
He pulls away from you then stands from the bed. “Let me get it from Jimin’s room.”
You stare at him questioningly because you really didn’t think he could surprise you even more. He returns with one of his burned CDs and you ask him if he has a sex playlist or something.
“I used to daydream about you to this,” he says, as he puts it in the CD player that your parents got you for your 17th birthday. “I listened to it after that very kiss we had and, well, we’re back home rehashing so many memories and I kinda just want to fulfill another fantasy of mine.”
He plays the song and the first notes get you all giddy and excited and nostalgic and very much turned on.
“This was my favorite song,” you say, as you signal him to come closer.
“I know. You played it all the time, I could hear it from the other room.”
You giggle, and it’s a sound he wants to listen to forever.
“So, what’s this fantasy of yours?” You ask, as you take your shirt off.
He licks his lips at the breathtaking sight of you, but he softens at the fairy tattoo on your shoulder, the one he customized and that you love showing off.
“Just… make love to you while this plays in the background,” he manages to say.
Your face softens, too, and it’s a sight he also wants to see everyday of his life.
“I’m all yours, Kook. Do whatever you please.”
It’s a week later when you tell him.
You’d just gotten back from that short trip to a resort that had you relaxed and stuffed with food. You video called with your parents during their sunset cruise and your father once again teased about not being grandparents yet and just like the first time, you brushed it off.
You’re lying on Jungkook’s chest as you laugh about Jimin’s terrible bowling skills. And in the silence, he asks, “does it bother you that your parents expect you to have kids?”
You knew he’d picked up on it the first time, but it’s just now that he’s bringing it up.
“A little. I try not to think about it though,” you sigh. “It’s another one of those expectations, you know? But I guess it’s a harder thing to talk to them about, that I don’t know if I want kids.”
He just hums and combs your hair with his fingers.
“Does it bother you?” You ask, suddenly feeling nervous. You know enough this is a make-or-break for many people.
“Not really,” he says. “It’s not easy to raise a child, much less carry one, and that’s something I can’t do for you. But I guess, it doesn’t matter. We can have kids. Or not. We can have a dog or a pet tortoise or a fish, really. When I think of a future, all I see is you. The rest is just a bonus.”
He speaks of your future with such certainty. He’s always talked about enjoying the moments but the one version of a future he wants is the one where you’re with him.
“I just want you to know that whatever you’re worried about, share it with me. I don’t want you to worry about me. We do this together. We figure it out together,” he adds.
And just like that, the fears and pressure you feel slowly dissipate. He’s the only version of the future you want. Everything else is just a bonus.
You turn to him with a kiss on his cheek.
“I love you, Kook. I don’t want anyone else to love me, and I don’t want to love anybody else,” you whisper like a plea, just like a promise.
“I’m not loving anybody else,” he kisses you.
And it’s his own promise he makes.
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Does porn promote bad sex education? I know a lot of the themes show is coercive, straight up un consensual, but also shows other unsafe risky sex such as no condoms and sex with strangers.
Yep!
Condom use
This review of content analyses found condom use was depicted in only 2-3% of heterosexual pornography videos [1]
This content analysis review also found "condom use is rare" [2]
This has real world impacts:
This article found "more frequent pornography consumption was associated with using condoms less consistently ... these results are consistent with the public health position that pornography can be a risk-factor for condomless sex" [3]
Results from six nationally representative studies found "consistent with a sexual scripting perspective on media processes and effects, emerging adults who viewed pornography were more likely to have condomless sex than their peers who did not consume pornography." [4]
A study on men who have sex with men found "safe-sex intentions after viewing unprotected-sex films were lower than after viewing protected-sex films" providing "novel and ecologically valid evidence that 'bareback' pornography consumption impacts viewer’s inclinations toward sexual risk-taking by lowering their intentions to use protected sex measure" [5]
Other sexual behavior
A review of 17 studies found "for both Internet pornography and general pornography, links with greater unsafe sex practices and number of sexual partners were identified" [6]
This study narrowed in on "sexual choking" and found "consuming pornography more frequently leads to more exposure to pornographic depictions of sexual choking, which in turn predicts a higher likelihood of choking sexual partners" [7]
A review focused on adolescents found "pornography use was associated with more permissive sexual attitudes and tended to be linked with stronger gender-stereotypical sexual beliefs" and was related to "the occurrence of sexual intercourse, greater experience with casual sex behavior, and more sexual aggression, both in terms of perpetration and victimization" [8]
Using porn as sex education
A common argument on this topic is that "no one actually uses porn as sex education!!". Unfortunately, this is incorrect.
One of the earlier results concerning the relationship between porn use and condom use was dependent on participants endorsement that "pornography is a primary source of information about sex". Unfortunately, over 40% of participants agreed with this statement [3]
A nationally representative study of the US found that for 18-24 year-olds "pornography was the most commonly endorsed helpful source" in comparison to "other possible options such as sexual partners, friends, media, and health care professionals" [9]
This review of 30 qualitative studies found "pornography use is considered normal by young people, reinforced by its usefulness as a tool for pleasure, information, and instruction" [10]
Please also see:
This post about the relationship between pornography and misogynistic beliefs and behaviors
This post that debunks the idea that pornography reduces rape
This post on the causal connection between pornography and rape
References under the cut:
Carrotte, E. R., Davis, A. C., & Lim, M. S. (2020). Sexual behaviors and violence in pornography: Systematic review and narrative synthesis of video content analyses. Journal of medical internet research, 22(5), e16702.
Miller, D. J., & McBain, K. A. (2022). The content of contemporary, mainstream pornography: A literature review of content analytic studies. American Journal of Sexuality Education, 17(2), 219-256.
Wright, P. J., Sun, C., Bridges, A., Johnson, J. A., & Ezzell, M. B. (2019). Condom use, pornography consumption, and perceptions of pornography as sexual information in a sample of adult US males. Journal of Health Communication, 24(9), 693-699.
Wright, P. J. (2022). Pornography consumption and condomless sex among emerging US adults: Results from six nationally representative surveys. Health Communication, 37(14), 1740-1747.
Jonas, K. J., Hawk, S. T., Vastenburg, D., & de Groot, P. (2014). “Bareback” pornography consumption and safe-sex intentions of men having sex with men. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 43, 745-753.
Harkness, E. L., Mullan, B., & Blaszczynski, A. (2015). Association between pornography use and sexual risk behaviors in adult consumers: A systematic review. Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking, 18(2), 59-71.
Wright, P. J., Herbenick, D., & Tokunaga, R. S. (2023). Pornography consumption and sexual choking: An evaluation of theoretical mechanisms. Health communication, 38(6), 1099-1110.
Peter, J., & Valkenburg, P. M. (2016). Adolescents and pornography: A review of 20 years of research. The Journal of Sex Research, 53(4-5), 509-531.
Rothman, E. F., Beckmeyer, J. J., Herbenick, D., Fu, T. C., Dodge, B., & Fortenberry, J. D. (2021). The prevalence of using pornography for information about how to have sex: Findings from a nationally representative survey of US adolescents and young adults. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 50, 629-646.
Peterson, A. J., Silver, G. K., Bell, H. A., Guinosso, S. A., & Coyle, K. K. (2023). Young people’s views on pornography and their sexual development, attitudes, and behaviors: A systematic review and synthesis of qualitative research. American Journal of Sexuality Education, 18(2), 171-209.
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short list of characters for my star blazers project
sorry if its a bit short, this is only like a couple, ill add more later
EARTH CHARACTERS Vice Admiral Juzo Okita (沖田十三) M61 Famed hero of the 2nd Battle over Mars. A stern, fearless stoic. Captain of the Yamato (UNS BBY-001) and formerly captain of the battleship Kirishima (UNS BBS-555). His battle strategies are nearly always high risk, high reward, and it miraculously always seems to work out perfectly.
Commander Mamoru Kodai (古代守) M27 Elder brother of Susumu and captain of UNS DDS-117 (JSS Yukikaze). His family was wiped out by an interplanetary bomb that struck the Miura Peninsula. Only he and his brother Susumu survived. He is shot down by the Gamilons while drawing their fire during Operation M so Okita could return home.
Commander-in-Chief Heikuro Todo (藤堂平九郎) M59 CinC of the Earth Defense Force. A calm, collected, reasonable man. Believes in the prioritization of morals over orders.
Admiral Kotetsu Serizawa (芹沢虎鉄) M55 Todo's right hand. A stern, angry, stubborn man. Harsh, immovable, but well intentioned. Reasonably disliked by the general public. Foil to Field Marshal Zöllick.
Lieutenant Commander Yuki Mori (森雪) F21 First mate aboard the Yamato, formerly a staff officer at EDF central command. Highly intelligent. A woman of great forethought and consideration. Kindhearted, consistently collected, fiercely believes in legitimate justice & the invalidity of sheer revenge, no matter how heinous the crime. Closely resembles the beautiful Sasha of Iscändar, who crashed on Mars.
Lieutenant Susumu Kodai (古代進) M19 Chief of the Tactical department. Hotheaded, righteous, brooding when upset. Mamoru's only surviving relative. Main protagonist of this story.
Lieutenant Daisuke Shima (島大介) M19 Friend and compatriot of Susumu. Yamato's Helmsman and Navigation department Chief. An expert navigator with an interest in astronomy. Calmer, more proper and more level-headed than Kodai. The exception being when Kodai is actually around, in which case Shima is even more rash and foolish than he.
Lieutenant JG Hajime Hirata (平田一) M21 An older fellow student at the Space Force academy when Kodai and Shima attended. A sort of "older brother" type friend to them.
Dr. Sakezo Sado (佐渡酒造) M54 A brilliant physician and a confidant of the Captain. Appointed as the ship's Medical department Chief despite no prior astronaval experience. A widely beloved drunkard. Cat person.
Makoto Harada (原田真琴) F21 Medic, officially a civilian.
Analyzer (AU09-Q1309) X3 AI companion of Dr. Sado and improvised autonomous subframe of the Yamato after the original was destroyed. Prefers to be called "Analyzer", as opposed to AU09 or Q1309.
Lieutenant Shiro Sanada (真田志郎) M28 Science and Technologies department Chief. A highly analytical and intellectually gifted man. His mind was designed to create machines. Highly emotionally intelligent, though bad at reading and expressing emotions. The Wave-Motion Gun is his brainchild.
Lieutenant JG Saburo Kato (加藤三郎) M23 Captain of the Yamato's Air Corps. Damn well coulda been born and raised in a cockpit, for the way he flies. Righteous, a little bit of a control freak. Close with Yamamoto.
Lieutenant JG Yasuo "Dash" Nanbu (南部"DASH"康雄) M20 Chief of Gunnery subdepartment of Tactial. Very much envies Kodai's position. About twice as hotheaded as Kodai, and 10 times as pigheaded. Excellent, loyal soldier, even if he disagrees with is commanding officers.
Ensign Yoshikazu Aihara (相原義一) M21 Operations department Chief and Comms officer. Reports to XO Mori. Sort of on-edge a lot of the time. Often overshadowed by those around him.
Ensign Kenjiro Ohta (太田健二郎) M24 Radar officer and Chief of the Space Weather Prediction subdepartment under Navigation. Eager and enthusiastically helpful. Bit of a mild Osaka hillbilly stereotype.
SP3 Haruki Ando (安藤春樹) M18 Wave-Motion Ballast & Shield technician. Brilliant kid, rushed through school with the goal of helping the cause against the Gamilons. Did not intend to be a soldier, merely a scientist, but is overjoyed nonetheless. Follows Kodai around like a duckling.
Kaoru Shintani (新谷かおる) M43 Chief OMCS technician. AKA, shipboard cook.
Lieutenant Commander Hikozaemon Tokugawa (徳川彦左衛門) M62 Chief engineer. Like Sado and Okita, quite brilliant, though quite odd. Former Chief engineer of the Kirishima. Very warm & paternal to all, considered the nice grandpa of the crew.
PO1 Sukeji Yabu (藪助治) M31 Tokugawa's favorite student. Cautious, introverted, kinda weird. Extremely intelligent. Refers to Starsha of Iscändar as a goddess.
Lieutenant JG Sho Yamazaki (山崎奨) M45 Tokugawa's official right hand.
Ensign Akira Yamamoto (山本明) F20 Another prodigy seemingly born to fly. Similarly to Kodai, she and her elder brother Akio were the only survivors of the early planet bombings by the Gamilons. ALSO similarly to Kodai, said elder brother died in Operation M. She and Kodai seem to keep ending up in bleak situations and having to save each other.
Ensign Hiroki Shinohara (篠原弘樹) M24 Deputy Captain of the ship's Air Corps. Quite unserious and smug in general. Very mature and insightful when the time calls for it. Never angry, and excellent mediator.
Lieutenant Akira Nemoto (根本明) M31 Captain of the Yamato's Marine Corps. Cold, quiet. Foolhardy, but a quick learner. Eager to kill Gamilons.
Corporal Kazuhiko Sugiyama (杉山和彦) M18 Deputy Captain of the ship's space Marines. Smug asshole most of the time, but humbles up quick when he deems it necessary. Doesn't like to take things too far. An EXCELLENT shot.
MCPO Isami Enomoto (榎本勇) M36 Boatswain's Mate. Kodai, Shima, and Hirata's former Practical Skills instructor. Simultaneously bubbly and friendly & strict and unforgiving.
PO3 Shinpei Iwata (岩田新平) and SP1 Kiyoshi Toyama (遠山清) M27 and M26 3rd deck operators. Inseparable. Idiots. Simultaneously fully competent and woefully incompetent. Often subjected to Enomoto's wrath.
WO2 Yuria Misaki (岬百合亜) F19 Member of the Supply department and self-proclaimed ESP haver.
WO2 Shigeru Hayashi (林繁) M18 Member of the Navigation department, plagued by visions (suffering from nightmares).
Lieutenant Kaoru Niimi (新見薫) F37 Chief of the Security department. Friend of Serizawa.
Lieutenant JG Shinya Itou (伊東真也) M21 Chief of the Armed Security department. Eerily friendly. Unnervingly polite. Gives of bad vibes.
WO1 Toru Hoshina (星名透) M19 Member of the Armed Security department. Love interest of Misaki.
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When we are talking about charity, there must exist a level of certain precaution to not let your emotional turmoil result in subpar actions. If empathy is a natural response to seeing people in pain, then it makes sense to liken it to a kneejerk response, much different from a graceful strike of a soccer player.
Very often, personal face-to-face ingroup charity is used to displace the actual efforts at improving people's conditions, and if your organization lacks political oversight or a certain analytical capacity, you might have serving the community replaced with individual help which eventually accumulates every bias and/or ends up being co-opted by some cult.
I am seeing especially egregorious horrific examples of that on Twitter right now, so I will use them to illistrate a point that is otherwise too global and deep-rooted.
In order to understand how this approach does its harm, you need to understand cause and effect, past and future.
THE CAUSE
We are talking about a clique that talks about investing in trans community by helping homeless and/or unemployed trans women by "paying their bills" for some months before they "get up on their own legs". Thankfully, it's a US based clique, so a lot of sociological studies exist to demonstrate the current situation with trans rights.
Let's investigate the causes of queer people being unemployed and/or homeless. The obvious systemic cause is trans-/homophobia, which results in people losing their capabilities immediately after leaving their parents/coming out to them (see e.g. https://doi.org/gq37kh), or otherwise follows the patterns of stigmatization, exclusion and victimization. If we address more widespread political economy of this vulnerability in the USA, topics of mental health, such as PTSD burnout, substance abuse and sexual abuse - including significantly from within queer community - emerge as vulnerability categories (https://doi.org/ggsjt6). As for how inventive abuse from within "community" is, one might refer themselves to the concepts of "hot allostatic load" and "identity abuse" (https://doi.org/ggmdcd).
Failures of t4t ethos and "community short-circuit" also have been described as sources of chronic homelessness among queer youth (https://doi.org/mpx8).
One must be especially mindful of the fact that level of education is an important - if not the most important - predictive factor of queer homelessness, effects were described in depth by Rachel M. Schmitz in the dissertation work "ON THE STREET AND ON CAMPUS".
While the effects identified the author ascribes to better socioeconomical standing of college students majorly, author both identified " experiences of homelessness" as "uniting people through a shared sense of struggle and conflict", and notably gives credit to educational endeavor of academia as vastly superior to "street experience", and studies in countries with accessible education still identify low education level with risks of anxiety and depression. (https://doi.org/mpx3) (https://doi.org/mpx4)
As Negura notes, "Ultimately, the three concepts—‘social support’, ‘social capital’ and ‘social bonds’ — are complementary. These terms are used here to understand the same reality of mutual help amongst people, from different social perspectives."
CONSEQUENCES
The most recognized effect of homelessness is anxiety and depression. Recent works identify that both of these health effects are significantly resolved through providing housing, however meta-analysis of the works being done is very complicated by poor methodology of studies: short follow-up, making it impossible to judge the homelessness outcomes, and high group heterogeneity. (https://doi.org/mpxx)
Among the outcomes of homelessness specifically in queer people, "utopian thinking" is seen, in accordance with England, 2022, "an inevitable part of community responses: to improve the present it, it is necessary to look beyond the present and to an alternative in which queerness does not only survive, but is valued, celebrated and encouraged".
To a materialist that would mean death of the community as a utopianism-free endeavor, but it is not, however, it should be noted that imperfect solutions to the crisis provide fertile soil to these cognitive failures.
Actual observations of the long-lasting effects of experienced homelessness are, indeed, lacking, but so far there's no data that homelessness and unemployment actually have significant lasting damage in the queer population, nonetheless remaining the risk factor in their duration.
One, however, important effect of escaping and avoiding homelessness is resiliency. As Cronley, 2017 notes, "Rather than understanding how youth are surviving in extremely adverse environments, research applies socially normative models of behavior to their actions such that conclusions of deviancy and marginalization are inevitable" and "youth rely on informal social networks to survive on the street and that spirituality, mental health, and creativity are associated with improved coping". Once again we are drawn to connections to education systems within this approach.
And therefore we must remember establishment of education systems during historical cases.
PAST
Expansion of educational processes has long been demonstrated to be a driver of establishing new or maintaining old hegemony.
One might remember Huguenots, who existed both in France and in Netherlands. Often, for example in Van der Lem's "Eighty Years War", Erasmus of Rotherdam is remembered to be as a reason for catholics' loss in the region - humanism, moderateness and church reforms were indeed the ideas of his. It's not easy for me to believe, considering how Netherlands were absolute leaders in amount of exterminated heretics during the 1520-1540, therefore you cannot imagine the humanism and spirit of mercantile freedom helping very much.
But comparing the historical evidence between French Huguenot fighting and Netherlands' Huguenot fighting, one stark difference is seen immediately without even examining the evidence - it's the material amount of Evidence piled up.
Netherlands of XVI century was ultimately a literature-centric country: rational argument, presented with necessary charisma and efficiency, put into the easy epistolary style allowing for open discussion - all that erased the differences between catholics and protestants.
And using this positional leveling, protestants spent 10-20 years before, well, protesting with continuous work of printing press, while catholics of Netherlands continued, thinking themselves safe, sat complacent, only satisfying the demands of the already intellectual public.
Indeed, you can not let a worldly peasant work with biology, err, theology, lest they will be mistaken and fall into the tenets of sin themselves. A good example of this "Don't give the North Korean kids iGEM distribution" was dutch translation of La Bouclier de la Foy by Nicole Grenier, which the translator prefaced with an easy explanation that you should never actually argue with heretics, the priestly class knows best.
In France, enjoying the closeness of Rome, literacy was synonymous with military industry, err, Raytheon, wait, wrong, Catholic Church.
Of course it was literacy ultimately sympathetic to the plight of the layman, and easily putting itself into their shoes - «Les disputes de Guillot le porcher et de la Bergère de S. Denis en France contre Jehan Calvin prédicant de Genesve» is exactly about the lower classes destroying Kalvin himself with facts and logic.
And, like this, simply by virtue of being able to work with higher reasoning in lower genres, you can win the Hegemony.
The ultimate victory of feminism in 1917 also answers a lot about where did soviet feminists come from - from the intermediate spaces where people of higher class can interact as equals with people of lower class, without financial or institutional power relationship between them. An example is, of course Pavlov teaching women's courses and creating a whole host of women physiologists, actual hymnasia and schools, such as in Sonya Yanovskaya case.
Masonic secret societies, where jews could freely talk to christians and nobles mingles with commoner bourgeois were this driver in bourgeois revolutions, universities drove February and October revolution, and even in the USA the connectedness to high-socioeconomic status, what is called "bridging social capital" remains a primary predictor of success of people from oppressed groups. (https://doi.org/gqmpxx)
FUTURE
As such, I cannot see a way for personal charity - bonding social capital, excising queer people from support networks and from solidarity with marginalized, destructive to both people outside of it and to attempts to build a queer community — to be excused in modern conditions.
Build new platforms to, instead of elevating select voices, sing together.
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First Blog, First Day in Research
Today (Mon. May 15) was quite fruitful and fascinating. I have been very curious about the new ideas I will learn about astrophotographs and how to use software to collect useful data from them. Our Principal Investigator, Professor Dianna M. Wilborne, is such a creative, passionate, caring, and innovative teacher and leader.
After filling us with excitement and enthusiasm, she worked us through her previous work on counting objects in astrophotographs, and an overview of what to expect ahead. We learned that we can certainly estimate, with high precision, the number of objects in astrophotographs. She showed we can do this by the "Divide & Conquer" method. This method involves developing and testing an algorithm on a concise subset of the original image. With this algorithm, we can develop software to determine the object count in a very small subset of a photograph.
We also learned about bracketing, exposure, and noise in photography and their significance in taking good astronomical photographs. I learned that bracketing helps reduce noise and prevents over and under-exposure. I also learned how secondary mirror attachment in cameras creates spikes in images of illuminated objects.
We also learned about Wood's problem-solving model and made a presentation on the Scientific Method. Wood's model involves: Defining the problem, Thinking about it, Planning a solution, Executing the solution, and Reflecting on the result(s). The Scientific Method involves 6 steps which are:
Making observations about the problem or system in question
Researching your Topic
Create a Hypothesis
Predictions and Testing
Analyze Results
Iteration
To help us make excellent blog posts about our research, we read the article "The 8 Habits of Highly Effective Bloggers" by Annabel Candy. These 8 habits include:
1. Effective bloggers are prolific
2. Effective bloggers are concise
3. Effective bloggers are analytical
4. Effective bloggers are lifelong learners
5. Effective bloggers are focused and consistent
6. Effective bloggers plan ahead
7. Effective bloggers are persistent
8. Effective bloggers are self-starters
I found the article very educative and helped me have a better perspective on blogging and its relevance in education. Speaking of the relevance of blogging in education, we also explored the article "Benefits Of Blogging In Education". The benefits outlined in the article include:
Promoting self-expression
Developing analytical thinking
Exercising students’ creativity
Improving students’ writing skills
Encouraging the sharing of resources among students and teachers.
Professor Wilborne also taught us how to keep well-organized data in a lab notebook.
As you might already notice, I am so excited to be part of this research, and I hope to make a meaningful contribution to it and hopefully learn even more.
Thank you so much for reading my first blog. Feel free to leave me a comment if you have any suggestions for me.
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Artificial Intelligence: Transforming Our Digital Future
Artificial intelligence (AI) stands at the forefront of technological innovation, reshaping industries, enhancing human capabilities, and driving unprecedented digital transformation. This comprehensive exploration delves into the multifaceted world of artificial intelligence, examining its current landscape, potential, and profound impact on our global ecosystem.
Understanding Artificial Intelligence: A Technical Overview
Artificial intelligence represents a sophisticated technological domain where machines simulate human intelligence processes. By leveraging complex algorithms and advanced computational techniques, AI systems can learn, reason, and make decisions with remarkable precision. The core of artificial intelligence lies in its ability to analyze vast datasets, recognize patterns, and generate insights that transcend traditional computational boundaries.
Key Components of Artificial Intelligence
Machine Learning Algorithms Machine learning serves as the fundamental backbone of artificial intelligence. These sophisticated algorithms enable systems to improve performance autonomously, learning from historical data and refining their decision-making capabilities without explicit programming.
Neural Networks Inspired by human brain structures, neural networks represent a critical artificial intelligence technology. These intricate computational models process information through interconnected nodes, mimicking biological neural systems and enabling complex pattern recognition.
Artificial Intelligence Applications Across Industries
Healthcare Transformation
Artificial intelligence is revolutionizing healthcare delivery through advanced diagnostic tools, predictive analytics, and personalized treatment recommendations. Machine learning models can now detect diseases with unprecedented accuracy, potentially saving countless lives through early intervention.
Financial Services Innovation
In the financial sector, artificial intelligence drives intelligent risk assessment, fraud detection, and algorithmic trading. These sophisticated systems analyze market trends, predict economic shifts, and optimize investment strategies with remarkable efficiency.
Manufacturing and Automation
Manufacturing ecosystems leverage artificial intelligence to enhance production processes, implement predictive maintenance, and optimize supply chain management. Intelligent robotics and automated systems powered by AI are transforming traditional manufacturing paradigms.
Emerging Trends in Artificial Intelligence
Ethical AI Development
As artificial intelligence continues evolving, significant emphasis is placed on developing ethical frameworks. Researchers and technologists are committed to creating AI systems that prioritize transparency, fairness, and human-centric design principles.
Generative AI Technologies
Generative artificial intelligence represents a groundbreaking frontier, enabling machines to create original content, including text, images, and complex computational models. These technologies are pushing the boundaries of creative and analytical capabilities.
Challenges and Considerations
While artificial intelligence promises transformative potential, critical challenges remain. Data privacy, algorithmic bias, and potential job displacement represent significant concerns that demand comprehensive, nuanced approaches to technological integration.
Mitigating Potential Risks
Responsible artificial intelligence development requires collaborative efforts between technologists, policymakers, and ethicists. Implementing robust governance frameworks and maintaining human oversight are crucial for sustainable AI advancement.
The Future of Artificial Intelligence
The trajectory of artificial intelligence suggests continuous innovation and increasingly sophisticated technological capabilities. As computational power expands and algorithmic complexity deepens, AI will likely become an even more integral component of our technological infrastructure.
Continuous Learning and Adaptation
Artificial intelligence systems will increasingly demonstrate enhanced adaptability, learning from diverse datasets and developing more nuanced, context-aware decision-making processes.
Conclusion
Artificial intelligence represents more than a technological trend—it's a fundamental paradigm shift transforming how we interact with technology, solve complex problems, and envision future possibilities. As we navigate this exciting digital landscape, responsible innovation and strategic implementation will be paramount.
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Optimizing Fleet Management for Cost Savings and Improved Efficiency
Fleet management is a critical aspect of the logistics industry, influencing cost efficiency, operational productivity, and customer satisfaction. As businesses face increasing pressure to reduce expenses and meet delivery expectations, optimizing fleet management has become essential. By leveraging advanced technologies and best practices, companies can achieve significant cost savings while improving efficiency across their logistics operations logistics course in kochi
The Importance of Fleet Management Optimization
Fleet management encompasses the administration, tracking, and maintenance of vehicles used in logistics and transportation. Inefficient fleet operations can lead to increased fuel costs, vehicle downtime, and missed delivery deadlines, ultimately impacting a company's bottom line and reputation. Optimizing fleet management addresses these challenges, ensuring that resources are used effectively and operations run smoothly.
Moreover, effective fleet management contributes to sustainability goals. By reducing fuel consumption and emissions, companies can minimize their environmental impact while enhancing their brand image as environmentally responsible businesses.
Key Strategies for Optimizing Fleet Management
Implementing Telematics SystemsTelematics technology is a cornerstone of modern fleet management. By equipping vehicles with GPS tracking and onboard diagnostics, companies can:
Monitor real-time vehicle locations and routes.
Analyze driver behavior to promote safer and more fuel-efficient driving habits.
Schedule maintenance proactively based on vehicle performance data.
These insights enable fleet managers to make informed decisions, reduce downtime, and improve overall efficiency.
Optimizing Route PlanningRoute optimization is essential for reducing fuel consumption and delivery times. Advanced software solutions use algorithms and real-time traffic data to:
Identify the most efficient routes.
Avoid congestion and road closures.
Minimize unnecessary mileage.
By adopting route planning tools, companies can save on fuel costs, reduce wear and tear on vehicles, and enhance delivery performance.
Regular Vehicle MaintenancePreventive maintenance is crucial for ensuring fleet reliability and longevity. A proactive maintenance schedule helps:
Reduce the risk of breakdowns and costly repairs.
Maintain fuel efficiency by keeping vehicles in optimal condition.
Extend the lifespan of fleet assets.
Leveraging telematics data to track vehicle health and maintenance needs further enhances this process.
Fuel Management PracticesFuel is one of the most significant expenses in fleet operations. Implementing fuel management strategies can lead to substantial savings:
Driver Training: Educating drivers on fuel-efficient practices, such as avoiding idling and maintaining steady speeds.
Adopting Alternative Fuels: Transitioning to electric, hybrid, or other low-emission vehicles.
Monitoring Fuel Usage: Using telematics to track fuel consumption and identify inefficiencies.
These measures not only reduce costs but also align with sustainability initiatives.
Fleet Right-SizingMaintaining an appropriately sized fleet is critical for cost efficiency. Overestimating fleet needs leads to unnecessary expenses, while underestimating can result in operational bottlenecks. By analyzing historical data and demand forecasts, businesses can:
Determine the optimal number of vehicles required.
Eliminate underutilized assets.
Invest in the right types of vehicles for specific operational needs.
Leveraging Automation and AIAutomation and artificial intelligence (AI) are transforming fleet management by streamlining processes and enhancing decision-making:
AI-Driven Analytics: Providing insights into fleet performance, fuel efficiency, and maintenance needs.
Automated Scheduling: Assigning vehicles and drivers based on real-time data and operational priorities.
Predictive Maintenance: Identifying potential issues before they become major problems, reducing downtime.
These technologies enable fleet managers to focus on strategic initiatives rather than manual administrative tasks.
Measuring Fleet Management Success
To evaluate the effectiveness of fleet optimization efforts, companies should track key performance indicators (KPIs) such as:
Fuel Efficiency: Monitoring miles per gallon (MPG) and fuel costs.
Vehicle Utilization Rates: Assessing how effectively vehicles are being used.
Maintenance Costs: Tracking expenses related to repairs and servicing.
Delivery Times: Measuring on-time delivery rates to ensure customer satisfaction.
By continuously analyzing these metrics, businesses can identify areas for improvement and adapt their strategies accordingly.
Challenges in Fleet Optimization
Despite the benefits, optimizing fleet management comes with challenges:
High Initial Investment: Implementing telematics systems, route optimization software, and AI solutions can require significant upfront costs.
Driver Resistance: Adapting to new technologies and practices may face pushback from drivers.
Data Overload: Managing and analyzing vast amounts of data from telematics and other sources can be overwhelming without proper tools.
Regulatory Compliance: Ensuring adherence to local and international transportation regulations adds complexity.
Addressing these challenges requires a strategic approach and strong leadership commitment to drive change.
The Future of Fleet Management
The future of fleet management lies in continued technological advancements and sustainability initiatives. Key trends include:
Electric and Autonomous Vehicles: Adoption of electric trucks and self-driving technology will revolutionize fleet operations, reducing costs and emissions.
Integration with IoT: Internet of Things (IoT) devices will provide real-time insights into vehicle and supply chain performance.
Sustainability Goals: Companies will increasingly prioritize green practices, such as carbon-neutral fleets and renewable energy-powered facilities.
By staying ahead of these trends, businesses can position themselves as leaders in efficient and sustainable logistics.Optimizing fleet management is essential for achieving cost savings and improved efficiency in logistics operations. By leveraging technologies such as telematics, AI, and route optimization software, companies can enhance performance, reduce expenses, and meet growing customer demands. While challenges exist, a commitment to continuous improvement and innovation ensures long-term success. As the logistics industry evolves, optimized fleet management will remain a cornerstone of operational excellence and sustainability logistic institute in kochi
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The Evolution of E-Commerce. A Glimpse Into the Future of Shopping
The world of e-commerce has undergone a profound transformation over the past two decades. What began as a niche alternative to brick-and-mortar shopping has evolved into a global industry that reshapes consumer behavior, business models, and technological innovation. From the early days of online retail to the cutting-edge technologies now driving sales, e-commerce continues to shape how businesses engage with customers and how individuals make purchasing decisions. Eric Hannelius, a business expert, highlights: “E-commerce has grown from an interesting alternative to the norm. It’s now an integrated part of our daily lives. The focus today is on creating meaningful experiences for customers.”
The Role of Mobile and the Rise of M-Commerce.
The most significant leap in e-commerce came with the proliferation of smartphones. By the early 2010s, mobile commerce, or m-commerce, began to surpass desktop shopping in terms of both traffic and sales. The convenience of shopping on the go, combined with mobile-friendly payment solutions, meant that e-commerce was no longer confined to home desktops. Consumers could now browse, compare, and purchase products anywhere, any time.
The integration of mobile wallets like Apple Pay, Google Pay, and increasingly localized options further accelerated the mobile shopping experience, allowing for seamless, instant transactions. “The shift to mobile was the turning point for many businesses,” says Eric Hannelius. “Companies that adapted quickly to this trend saw dramatic growth. They have met consumer demand and anticipated it.”
Personalization and Customer Experience.
In the current landscape, e-commerce is convenience and creating customized experiences. Artificial intelligence (AI) and data analytics play an essential role in enabling businesses to deliver personalized content and recommendations to shoppers. By analyzing consumer behavior, purchase history, and browsing patterns, retailers can offer tailored suggestions, improving customer satisfaction and boosting sales.
The rise of subscription models, where customers receive regular deliveries of goods based on personal preferences, is one example of how e-commerce is leveraging personalization. Companies that have used subscription services to generate predictable revenue streams while offering a curated shopping experience.
For Eric Hannelius, this shift in the customer journey is profound. “Today’s e-commerce landscape is built on user-centric models. The customers’ preferences, needs, and behaviors are at the forefront of all business strategies. It’s about selling solutions that fit into lives seamlessly.”
The Impact of Artificial Intelligence and Automation.
As AI continues to evolve, it is transforming the e-commerce space in more advanced ways. Chatbots, for instance, have made it easier for businesses to handle customer service inquiries around the clock, while machine learning algorithms predict future trends and customer preferences with incredible accuracy. Retailers are also using AI-powered inventory management systems to optimize supply chains, ensuring products are available when and where consumers want them. Furthermore, automation in fulfillment processes has reduced shipping times significantly. Many e-commerce companies now offer same-day or two-day delivery.
The Future of E-Commerce.
Looking forward, it’s clear that e-commerce will continue to evolve in exciting directions. Augmented reality (AR) and virtual reality (VR) are poised to redefine online shopping by offering immersive shopping experiences. For example, customers could try on clothing or preview furniture in their homes virtually before making a purchase.
Blockchain technology is another area that could revolutionize e-commerce by increasing transparency and trust in transactions. As the push for decentralized finance grows, blockchain’s ability to facilitate secure, peer-to-peer transactions could significantly lower transaction fees and enhance consumer confidence.
E-commerce has come a long way since its inception, and the next decade promises even more dramatic advancements. The future of online shopping will see an increase in personalization, the integration of innovative technologies like AI, AR, and blockchain, and an even more seamless connection between the consumer and the brand. As Eric Hannelius says: “The e-commerce revolution is about creating an ecosystem where consumers can interact with brands in new, meaningful ways.” Businesses that can innovate, embrace new technologies, and adapt to consumer demands will be the ones who thrive in this ever-changing landscape.
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T20 Cricket & Technology: Exploring Laser247’s Impact on Team India Fan Engagement
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Introduction to Laser247 and its Popularity
Cricket has evolved dramatically over the years, blending tradition with innovation. At the forefront of this transformation is Laser247, a groundbreaking tool that's changing how fans interact with their favorite sport. As Team India continues to inspire millions, technology like Laser247 plays a pivotal role in deepening fan engagement. Imagine being able to connect with live matches in real-time, enhancing your viewing experience from the comfort of your home or at the stadium. With its user-friendly interface and immersive features, Laser247 is capturing the attention of cricket enthusiasts everywhere. This blog will delve into how this innovative platform revolutionizes fan interaction and transforms T20 cricket into an exhilarating digital experience for every supporter of Team India. Get ready to explore the intersection between sportsmanship and cutting-edge technology!
The Role of Technology in Modern Cricket
Technology has transformed cricket, enhancing the experience for players and fans alike. From data analytics to advanced broadcasting techniques, innovation is at the forefront of the game. Players use detailed performance metrics to refine their skills. Coaches analyze every ball bowled or hit with precision tools. This shift allows teams to strategize effectively against opponents. Fan engagement has also evolved dramatically. High-definition broadcasts bring every detail into homes, while apps provide real-time stats and updates. Spectators can now immerse themselves in matches like never before. Moreover, technologies such as Hawk-Eye and Decision Review System (DRS) ensure fairness on the field. They aid umpires in making informed decisions, reducing errors that could impact a game's outcome significantly. As cricket continues its evolution, technology will play an even more integral role in shaping how fans connect with their favorite teams and players.
Laser247: A Revolutionary Fan Engagement Tool
Laser247 is transforming the way fans engage with cricket. This innovative platform goes beyond traditional methods of interaction, offering a dynamic experience that connects supporters directly to their favorite teams. With real-time updates and personalized content, Laser247 ensures fans never miss a moment. Whether it’s live statistics or behind-the-scenes footage, the tool enhances the viewing experience in ways previously unimaginable. The interactive features allow users to participate actively during matches. Fans can vote on plays or predict outcomes while enjoying the game from their homes or at stadiums. Moreover, Laser247 fosters community among supporters. It encourages sharing experiences and insights through social media integration, creating a vibrant fan ecosystem. This technology not only keeps fans informed but also cultivates loyalty to Team India by making every match feel personal and engaging.
Impact of Laser247 on Team India's Fan Engagement
Laser247 has transformed the way Team India engages with its fans. The platform provides real-time interactions, allowing supporters to feel connected during matches. Fans can participate in live polls, quizzes, and contests through Laser247. This interactive approach enhances their match-day experience significantly. It turns passive viewers into active participants. Additionally, Laser247 offers exclusive content that keeps fans coming back for more. Behind-the-scenes footage and player interviews create a deeper bond between the team and its followers. The social media integration ensures that every engagement is shareable. Fans can showcase their love for Team India across various platforms effortlessly. Moreover, personalized notifications about match updates keep the excitement alive even when fans are not watching live games. This level of connection fosters loyalty and strengthens community ties among supporters of Team India.
Case Studies: How Other Teams Have Utilized Laser247
Several teams have embraced Laser247 to enhance their fan engagement strategies. The Mumbai Indians, for instance, integrated Laser247 into their matchday experience. Fans could interact with live stats and receive personalized content based on player performances. The Sydney Sixers also saw success by using Laser247 during the Big Bash League. They offered fans real-time updates through a seamless app integration that kept supporters engaged from home or in the stadium. In England, the Nottinghamshire County Cricket Club utilized Laser 247 to create unique experiences around key matches. They provided exclusive behind-the-scenes access and interactive polls that allowed fans to vote on game-related decisions. These case studies highlight how innovative technology fosters deeper connections between teams and their supporters. By leveraging Laser247’s capabilities, franchises can amplify excitement while keeping fans invested throughout the season.
Future Possibilities and Innovations in T20 Cricket Technology
The future of T20 cricket technology is brimming with potential. Innovations like augmented reality could enhance fan experiences, bringing live stats and player interactions directly into viewers' homes. Wearable tech for players is on the rise too. Imagine sensors that monitor performance in real-time, providing crucial data to coaches and teams instantly. This could lead to tailored training regimens based on individual athlete needs. Artificial intelligence might reshape game strategies as well. AI algorithms can analyze opponent weaknesses, predicting outcomes more accurately than ever before. Moreover, enhanced broadcasting techniques will transform how fans engage with matches. Virtual stadiums may allow users to "attend" games from anywhere in the world while interacting with fellow fans. As these advancements unfold, tools like Laser247 will likely evolve alongside them, creating richer connections between teams and their supporters. The landscape of T20 cricket is set for exciting changes ahead.
Conclusion and Recommendations for Team India's Use of Laser247
As the T20 format continues to gain popularity, the integration of technology like Laser247 becomes essential for enhancing fan experiences. Team India stands at a unique crossroads where it can leverage this innovative tool to deepen its connection with fans. Implementing Laser247 could open new avenues for engagement. By offering real-time statistics and interactive content during matches, fans will feel more involved than ever before. This platform not only allows followers to stay updated but also enriches their overall viewing experience. Moreover, incorporating user-generated content through Laser247 can foster community among supporters. Fans sharing their stories or opinions creates a sense of belonging that transcends geographical barriers. To maximize the potential benefits of Laser247, Team India should consider launching exclusive promotions or contests tied to match events. This would not only incentivize participation but also amplify excitement around upcoming games. Embracing technologies like Laser247 is vital for staying relevant in today’s digital age. The cricket landscape is evolving rapidly; therefore, being proactive in fan engagement strategies will ensure that Team India maintains its stronghold over passionate supporters across the globe.
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Podcasting Market Size, Top Companies Share, Industry Statistics and Future Trends 2025-2037
Research Nester assesses the growth and market size of the global podcasting market which is anticipated to be on account of the rising utilization of podcasts in educational contexts.
Research Nester’s recent market research analysis on “Podcasting Market: Global Demand Analysis & Opportunity Outlook 2037” delivers a detailed competitor’s analysis and a detailed overview of the global podcasting market in terms of market segmentation by genre, format area, and by region.
Increasing Use of Social Media Marketing to Promote Global Market Share of Podcasting
The global podcasting market is estimated to grow majorly due to the use of social media marketing tools to expand the reach and grow the audience. Podcasters can use social media marketing tools and techniques to efficiently promote their content. By using these services, podcasters may create customized ads that resonate with their target audience. By tracking data like engagement rates, click-through rates, and follower growth, podcasters may determine what content resonates with their audience and adjust their approach.
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Tools like Twitter Analytics, Instagram Analytics, and Facebook Insights provide useful data that can direct upcoming advertising initiatives. Another effective strategy for podcast social media advertising is user-generated material, or UGC. Encouragement of listeners to share thoughts and experiences with the podcast can result in the creation of authentic and engaging content.
Some of the major growth factors and challenges that are associated with the growth of the global podcasting market are:
Growth Drivers:
Growing integration of advanced technologies
Expanded diversity initiatives
Challenges:
New podcasters often face challenges in mastering recording, editing, and mixing software, which can be daunting for those without technical backgrounds. High-quality microphones, headphones, and recording equipment can be expensive, discouraging potential podcasters from entering the market. Moreover, inadequate knowledge about sound engineering can lead to poor audio quality, which may turn off listeners.
By format area, the global podcasting market is segmented into interviews, panels, solo, repurposed content, and conversational. The interviews segment is poised to garner the highest revenue by the end of 2037 by growing at a significant CAGR over the forecast period. The uniqueness and originality of the interview podcasts are responsible for the segment's rise. Every episode features guests or invitees who captivate the audience with their original ideas, intriguing topics, and unforgettable experiences. Furthermore, the interview style promotes a wide range of viewpoints, which sparks thought-provoking conversations and increases audience participation.
The solo segment is predicted to grow significantly in 2037. This format is created for the content by someone who has knowledge or experience in that particular field. Solo podcasts make it easier to establish a direct connection with the listener. Solo podcasting is becoming more popular among musicians due to its affordability and ease of use. All you need is a microphone and some basic editing software.
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By region, the Europe podcasting market is set to generate the highest revenue by the end of 2036. The market is growing in the region owing to the rising popularity of podcasts as an easy-to-use and entertaining source of information and entertainment, as well as the expanding demand for audio content. The primary means of connecting with audiences who consume audio content is through mobile devices; 84% of publishers and 70% of buy-side respondents stated that they anticipate connecting with their audiences through mobile devices.
Moreover, due to the availability of localized material, multilingual audiences, high internet penetration, and other considerations, podcast consumption has increased dramatically in regional countries. Furthermore, the increasing number of podcasting festivals, events, and awards throughout Europe is indicative of the medium's expanding influence.
This report also provides the existing competitive scenario of some of the key players which includes, Amazon.com Inc., Apple, Inc., iHeartMedia Inc., Hindenburg Systems, Pandora Media, LLC, TuneIn, Inc., Audacy, Inc., Sound Cloud Limited, Spotify AB, Podcastle, Inc., and others.
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Transforming Innovation: Strategic Life Sciences Advisor
Empowering life sciences ventures with tailored strategic Science advisory services. Unlock growth, optimize innovation, and navigate complex industry challenges with expert guidance. Empowering life sciences organizations to achieve excellence through specialist strategic advisory services. From biotech and pharma to healthcare innovation, we provide customized solutions to drive growth, enhance operational efficiency, and navigate complex regulatory landscapes. Our experienced team helps you translate ground breaking ideas into actionable strategies, unlocking your full potential in an ever-evolving industry.
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Sustainable Cargo Solutions in North America: Challenges and Opportunities
The cargo and logistics industry is the backbone of North America's economy, facilitating the movement of goods across vast distances. However, as environmental concerns continue to grow, there is increasing pressure on the industry to adopt sustainable practices. Sustainable cargo solutions in North America are not just a moral imperative but also a strategic move to align with regulatory requirements and consumer expectations. This article explores the challenges and opportunities in implementing sustainable cargo solutions across the continent.
The Need for Sustainable Cargo Solutions
The logistics sector in North America contributes significantly to carbon emissions due to its reliance on fossil fuels, energy-intensive operations, and the vast infrastructure required for cargo transportation. With climate change at the forefront of global concerns, the adoption of sustainable practices has become critical. Governments, corporations, and consumers are increasingly demanding greener alternatives, making sustainability a key focus for the cargo industry.
Challenges in Achieving Sustainability
High Costs of Transition One of the primary challenges in implementing sustainable cargo solutions is the high upfront cost. Transitioning to greener technologies, such as electric trucks or hydrogen-powered vehicles, involves significant investment. Small and medium-sized logistics companies, which form a large part of the industry in North America, often struggle to afford such changes.
Infrastructure Limitations Sustainable cargo operations require supporting infrastructure, such as charging stations for electric vehicles or facilities for handling alternative fuels. In many parts of North America, this infrastructure is either limited or non-existent, creating logistical bottlenecks.
Regulatory Complexity North America spans multiple countries, each with its own set of regulations regarding emissions and sustainability. For cargo companies operating across borders, navigating this regulatory landscape can be complex and resource-intensive.
Technology Adoption Barriers While technologies like blockchain for supply chain transparency and IoT-enabled sensors are available, many companies face challenges in integrating them into existing operations. Resistance to change and the lack of technical expertise can further hinder adoption.
Balancing Efficiency and Sustainability Cargo operations prioritize speed and cost-efficiency, which can sometimes conflict with sustainability goals. For example, eco-friendly shipping methods may take longer or incur higher costs, which can deter companies from adopting them.
Opportunities in Sustainable Cargo Solutions
Advancements in Green Technologies North America is witnessing significant advancements in green transportation technologies, such as electric and hybrid vehicles, hydrogen fuel cells, and biofuels. These innovations present an opportunity for cargo companies to reduce emissions while improving operational efficiency.
Government Incentives and Policies Governments across North America are introducing incentives to promote sustainable practices. For instance, tax breaks for electric vehicle adoption and grants for renewable energy use in logistics hubs provide financial support to companies investing in sustainability.
Growing Consumer Demand for Sustainability Consumers are increasingly favoring companies with green supply chains. By adopting sustainable cargo solutions in North America, logistics providers can enhance their brand image, attract eco-conscious clients, and gain a competitive edge in the market.
Digital Transformation in Logistics Technologies like route optimization software, predictive analytics, and blockchain are enabling more efficient and transparent cargo operations. By reducing fuel consumption and minimizing waste, these tools contribute to both cost savings and sustainability.
Collaborative Models Collaboration between cargo companies, technology providers, and policymakers can drive sustainable innovation. For example, shared logistics networks can optimize cargo loads, reducing the number of trips and associated emissions.
Examples of Sustainable Practices in North America
Electric Fleets: Companies like UPS and FedEx are adopting electric delivery trucks to reduce their carbon footprint.
Green Warehousing: Many logistics hubs are transitioning to solar-powered facilities and energy-efficient equipment.
Eco-Friendly Packaging: The use of biodegradable and reusable packaging materials is becoming a standard practice in the industry.
Rail Transport: Shifting cargo from trucks to trains, which are more fuel-efficient, is gaining popularity for long-distance shipping.
The Road Ahead
The push for sustainable cargo solutions in North America is both a challenge and an opportunity. While the road to sustainability is fraught with hurdles, the long-term benefits are undeniable. Companies that embrace green practices today will not only contribute to environmental preservation but also position themselves as industry leaders in a rapidly evolving market.
To accelerate the transition, collaboration among stakeholders is key. Governments must continue to offer incentives and build the necessary infrastructure, while companies must invest in innovation and technology. Consumers, too, play a role by choosing brands committed to sustainability.
Conclusion
Sustainable cargo solutions in North America are essential for balancing economic growth with environmental stewardship. By overcoming challenges and leveraging opportunities, the logistics industry can pave the way for a greener, more sustainable future. Adopting these solutions isn’t just about compliance; it’s about staying competitive and relevant in a world increasingly defined by sustainability.
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How Innovation is Changing the Music Landscape
The world of music is experiencing a seismic shift, fueled by groundbreaking innovations and digital advancements. These changes are influencing how artists create, fans consume, and the industry evolves. Tools like AI music generators, lyric analyzers, and platforms by industry leaders are redefining what’s possible in music creation and appreciation.
This article explores the contributions of Warner Music, examines iconic songs, and highlights the transformative potential of AI-driven tools.
Warner Music: Leading the Way in a Digital Era
Warner Music has consistently been a trailblazer in the music industry. With a strong focus on artist development and technological integration, the label stays ahead of the curve in a competitive digital age.
The company’s innovative strategies include using data analytics to predict music trends and partnering with cutting-edge platforms to enhance artist reach. Warner Music exemplifies how traditional artistry and modern technology can work hand-in-hand to create a thriving music ecosystem.
Emotional Resonance in Tracks Like “Wanna Be That Song”
Great music is a vessel for emotion, and songs like "Wanna Be That Song" capture this essence perfectly. With lyrics that tug at the heartstrings and a melody that stays with listeners, the track has become a defining anthem for many.
Modern platforms amplify the impact of such songs, offering background stories, lyric breakdowns, and curated playlists that deepen listener engagement. Technology ensures that timeless tracks like these continue to resonate across generations.
The Timeless Appeal of “Part of Your World”
Disney’s "Part of Your World" is more than just a song—it’s an experience. The "Part of Your World" lyrics from The Little Mermaid epitomize storytelling through music, capturing the universal desire for exploration and belonging.
Today, lyric-focused platforms allow fans to reconnect with classics like this, offering fresh insights and interpretations. This accessibility ensures that songs from the past remain relevant and cherished in the present.
Lyric Conversion: Bridging Music and Meaning
Advancements in AI now make it possible to convert songs to lyrics with remarkable ease. These tools provide accurate transcriptions, helping fans connect with the lyrical depth of their favorite tracks.
Whether you’re singing along at a concert or studying a song’s poetic elements, lyric conversion tools add immense value. By making lyrics more accessible, they bridge the gap between music’s auditory and literary elements.
Your AI Music Generator: Creativity Without Limits
Imagine creating a song from scratch with no prior musical knowledge. Tools like Your AI music generator are making this dream a reality. These platforms use advanced algorithms to compose unique melodies, offering an exciting blend of human creativity and machine intelligence.
AI music generators are particularly useful for budding artists, helping them experiment with sounds and genres without the need for expensive studio equipment. They demonstrate how technology can democratize music creation while inspiring new forms of artistic expression.
Balancing Innovation with Authenticity
While technology brings unparalleled opportunities, it also raises questions about the future of music’s emotional authenticity. Can AI-generated songs truly evoke the same feelings as those crafted by human hands? For labels like Warner Music, the challenge lies in leveraging technology without losing the personal touch that defines great music.
By combining technological advancements with their rich heritage, industry leaders are finding ways to balance innovation with tradition, ensuring that music remains both progressive and heartfelt.
Conclusion
The interplay between technology and music is creating a world of exciting possibilities. From Warner Music’s forward-thinking initiatives to tools like lyric converters and AI music generators, the music industry is entering a new era of creativity and accessibility.
As we embrace these advancements, it’s important to honor the emotional and human aspects of music that make it universally beloved. Whether you’re rediscovering classics like "Part of Your World" or creating original tunes with AI, the future of music is full of opportunities to explore.
What’s your favorite way to engage with music in this digital age? Let us know in the comments below!
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Exide Becomes First Battery Manufacturer to Embrace Green Logistics with GreenLine
In a pioneering move towards sustainability, Exide Industries, India’s largest-selling battery brand, has become the first battery manufacturer to integrate eco-friendly LNG-powered trucking into its logistics operations. This step is part of Exide’s commitment to reducing its carbon footprint and enhancing the sustainability of its entire supply chain.
By partnering with Essar GreenLine Mobility Solutions, Exide has adopted an innovative logistics solution that significantly reduces Scope 3 emissions while ensuring efficient and reliable transportation. GreenLine’s LNG-powered fleet, with its advanced features like real-time vehicle monitoring, predictive analytics, and safety measures, will support Exide in delivering its products while adhering to its ambitious sustainability goals.
The Flag Off event was attended by Krishna Kant Singh (COM, Hosur), Balakumar Subbiah (Material Head, Hosur), Sankhadeep Bardhan (Production Head VRLA), DINESH BABU (Production Head Auto), Prasath A (Head EHS, Hosur), and Manjunath M. (Plant Logistics) from Exide. Representing GreenLine were Charles Devlin D’Costa (Vice President – Sales & Business Excellence) and Aniruddha Neogi (DGM, General Management). Their collaboration and efforts have been pivotal in launching this green initiative.
Exide’s adoption of LNG-powered vehicles marks a transformative moment for the logistics sector, where green solutions are becoming increasingly critical. GreenLine’s fleet, capable of covering up to 1200 km per tank, will ensure that Exide’s long-haul requirements are met with minimal environmental impact. This partnership exemplifies how companies can leverage eco-friendly transportation solutions to drive efficiency while reducing their carbon emissions.
As the first battery manufacturer to make this bold move, Exide is setting a new standard in green logistics, demonstrating how sustainable practices can be integrated seamlessly into operations without compromising on reliability or performance.
By embracing LNG-powered trucking, Exide is not just meeting regulatory demands but also positioning itself as a leader in green innovation within the logistics space. This partnership with GreenLine showcases how logistics companies can integrate cutting-edge technologies to drive both sustainability and operational success.
With increasing pressure on industries to reduce their environmental impact, Exide’s commitment to sustainable logistics will likely inspire other manufacturers to follow suit. Through this partnership, GreenLine and Exide are demonstrating that sustainable logistics is not just a trend but a key component of future-proof business strategies.
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Exploring the Role of AI in the Future of Banking and Finance
Artificial Intelligence (AI) has emerged as a transformative force across industries, and the financial services sector is no exception. From streamlining operations to improving customer experiences, AI is reshaping the way financial institutions operate and innovate. As we look to the future, it becomes evident that AI development company will play a pivotal role in driving efficiency, enabling better decision-making, and opening new avenues for growth in financial services.
1. Enhanced Customer Experience
AI is revolutionizing customer interactions in financial services by making them more personalized and efficient. Chatbots and virtual assistants powered by natural language processing (NLP) are becoming the norm, offering 24/7 support to customers.
Personalized Financial Advice: AI can analyze customer data to provide tailored advice on savings, investments, and expense management. For example, robo-advisors use AI algorithms to offer investment recommendations based on an individual’s financial goals and risk tolerance.
Improved Accessibility: AI-powered tools help bridge language barriers and provide financial services to underserved populations, enhancing inclusivity.
In the future, we can expect AI to offer even more sophisticated and intuitive interfaces, making financial services more accessible to a broader audience.
2. Fraud Detection and Risk Management
Fraud detection and risk management are among the most critical applications of AI in financial services. AI systems can analyze vast amounts of data in real-time, identifying unusual patterns or transactions that may indicate fraudulent activity.
Advanced Fraud Detection: AI uses machine learning to identify anomalies in transaction data, flagging suspicious activities with greater accuracy than traditional rule-based systems.
Risk Assessment: AI models can predict credit risk by analyzing diverse data points, from financial history to social behavior, allowing lenders to make more informed decisions.
In the future, AI will continue to evolve, leveraging advancements in predictive analytics and behavioral biometrics to combat increasingly sophisticated fraud schemes.
3. Process Automation
AI-driven automation is streamlining back-office operations, reducing costs, and improving efficiency. Tasks such as document processing, compliance checks, and reconciliation are being automated using AI.
Robotic Process Automation (RPA): Combining AI with RPA enables financial institutions to automate repetitive tasks, such as data entry and account updates, freeing up human employees for more strategic roles.
Compliance Automation: AI can help financial institutions stay compliant with ever-changing regulations by automatically monitoring and reporting irregularities.
As automation technology advances, we can anticipate an even greater reduction in operational overhead and faster processing times across financial institutions.
4. Predictive Analytics for Business Growth
AI’s ability to analyze historical data and identify trends is helping financial institutions make data-driven decisions.
Market Predictions: AI models can analyze financial markets to predict trends, providing valuable insights for traders and investors.
Customer Retention: Predictive analytics can identify customers who are likely to churn, allowing banks to take proactive measures to retain them.
Product Development: Financial institutions can use AI to identify unmet customer needs and develop products or services tailored to those gaps.
Future advancements in AI will make these predictions more precise, enabling financial institutions to stay ahead in an increasingly competitive market.
5. Personalized Wealth Management
Wealth management is another area where AI is making significant inroads. Robo-advisors are already transforming investment strategies for individual and institutional clients.
Dynamic Portfolio Management: AI can continuously monitor and adjust investment portfolios based on market conditions and individual preferences.
Enhanced Client Insights: AI tools provide wealth managers with deep insights into client behavior, enabling more personalized advice.
As AI systems grow more sophisticated, they will likely offer hyper-personalized strategies that align with real-time market dynamics and individual client goals.
6. AI in Financial Inclusion
AI is playing a crucial role in expanding access to financial services for underserved populations, particularly in developing economies.
Micro-lending Platforms: AI assesses creditworthiness based on alternative data sources, such as mobile payment histories and social media activity, enabling loans to individuals without traditional credit histories.
Blockchain and AI Integration: The integration of AI with blockchain can facilitate secure and transparent transactions for the unbanked population.
In the future, AI-driven solutions will continue to bridge gaps in financial inclusion, fostering economic growth and reducing inequality.
7. Ethical Considerations and Challenges
Despite its immense potential, the adoption of AI in financial services comes with challenges and ethical concerns.
Bias in AI Models: AI systems can inherit biases present in training data, leading to unfair outcomes.
Data Privacy: The extensive use of customer data for AI-driven insights raises concerns about privacy and security.
Regulatory Compliance: Financial institutions must navigate complex regulatory landscapes to ensure ethical AI deployment.
The future will demand robust frameworks for ethical AI, emphasizing transparency, fairness, and accountability.
8. Future Trends and Innovations
The future of AI in financial services is poised to be shaped by emerging trends and technologies:
Explainable AI (XAI): Financial institutions will adopt XAI to ensure transparency in AI-driven decision-making processes, building trust with customers and regulators.
Quantum Computing: The integration of AI with quantum computing will unlock unparalleled processing power, enabling complex financial modeling and risk assessment.
AI-Powered Ecosystems: Open banking and API-driven ecosystems will leverage AI to offer seamless integration between various financial services.
Decentralized Finance (DeFi): AI will play a key role in automating and optimizing decentralized financial platforms, enhancing accessibility and efficiency.
Conclusion
The future of AI in financial services is bright and transformative. From improving customer experiences to driving financial inclusion and combating fraud, AI is redefining the boundaries of what’s possible. However, to fully realize its potential, financial institutions must address challenges related to ethics, bias, and regulatory compliance. By embracing innovation and ensuring responsible AI deployment, the financial industry can pave the way for a smarter, more inclusive, and efficient future.
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